I'm juz damn pissed! Y things had become like tt? You've noe me for so long liao yet still dunno me?!

I've respected you like an elder brother. i've treat u like an elder brother, i've always tok to u like ur younger sis! juz coz of ppl started to tok in front about us, u started to suspect tt i like u?! COME ON LAH! if i wanna like u, i would have loooong ago.. not till now lor!!! n then ppl always say things.. i cant stop them, but i noe very well, hw i feel towards u... so i no need to scare.. so when they juz say i let them say... then end up, u r the one kana influenced!?!??!?!

nw wat, juz coz ppl say so much things, make u suspected tt i like u (greatest joke of the century), u r treating me like u dunno me, like u hated me. I'm no longer in ur 'MUST MEET' list. i no longer in ur consideration when going out (u juz hope tt i dun follow!)

well, this is TYL! TYL believes in platonic frenship! and TYL is damn prideful and ego! if u wish tt we shld juz go back to acquaintance and not good frens, i glad to do so... SO BE IT!

原来我们之间的友情是那么脆弱的。 什么同甘共苦？什么有福同享、有难同当？都是废话！！！

nw then i realised, those days when we met our down times, we were always there for one another. we were so close, we shared our woes and happiness. we planned our 'revenge'... ALL THESE are fake one lor!?!? all the things we have been thru, cant fight the few words ppl tell u!!!

I M TOTALLY DISAPPOINTED IN U!!!!!

This is a long overdue post... well... i was bz and abit lazy... :p

Anyway, on the 27th Nov after our dear LWY's vocal exam, food tester TYL, ATXH and LWY decided to givethis new Taiwan Restaurant - Xi Men Ding 西门町 in Raffle's City a try. Though the 3 of us has limited captial - being avid food lovers... we juz cant help it but to try.... the price is abit steep though.

Su Ping, if u happened to read my blog... give this a try!!! :p

While waiting for food.. i juz start snapping away

This is... but it is NICE!! it taste alot better than pasar malam, and any other Taiwan snacks kiosk... haven try the REAL taiwan 盐酥鸡 b4... but this is the best among those in SG

This looked half finshed.. coz i 4got to take the photo b4 i ate.. hehehe.. this is pig's trotter mee sua... 猪脚面线.. the mian xian is different from wat we ate in SG.. is nice... 很有咬劲. and of coz, the braised pig's trotter... tender, flavourful.. yumz...

This is the 大肠四季豆... big intestines with French beans aka 4 seasons beans (directly translation). For those who dun like intestines, this is absolutely a must try dish. The dried shrimps are fried till crispy, the French beans are crunchy and the big intestines were fried till so crispy till u dun even noe tt it is big intestine. so ppl who dun like intestines can try it. :p

and finally, the 卤肉饭 with special order 梅菜 added in.... 梅菜入口即化... yet u dun feel tt it is some food that have been cooked and re-cooked for dance... the braised meat 肥而不腻... wonders....

but of coz, be prepared that the price r slightly high... some may think tt this type of dishes really not worth the money.... but to me.. i think is 值得.... :p of coz it is based on the tastebuds of ppl who never tried the authentic Taiwan food b4... this is consider the best of taiwan food of wat we had eaten in SG....

I shld studying food chem... but then it is juz so dry and i simply can remember all the rxn happening! i mean i noe wat happen to the food, i noe wat is the mechanism behind, but i cant remember who/what are involved! sianz to the max... well.. suan le.. i have to study

anyway... sharing with u my latest fave songs!!! lyrics super meaningful... :)

1. Hebe - 寂寞寂寞就好

2. Elva - 错的人

3. Kenji Wu - 没关系

I started to wonder again... shld i cont'd studying? yes, studying has been always my dream. nw i'm in it, and is enjoying every moment (of coz i still complain on the amt of report and work done).

my super seniors have graduated, n currently are looking for jobs.. either they cant find or the pay is as low as my last drawn pay.

Reality strikes me.. y did i put myself into this 'meeting datelines' misery for 2 yrs when ended up i cant have a big jump in my salary?

my frens told me i shld juz cont'd, at least i got exp... but still... TYX says we r constantly in quarter life crisis... i guess so.. wahahhaaa...

btw, i'm still having class nw.... :p

After watching the repeat telecast of Singapore Hits Award 2010, made me wonder, did I follow closely on SHA for all 16 years? hahahaha... i dun remember, but i'm sure for the past 16 yrs, i NEVER once without an idol. Looking back, i didnt noe y i even labelled some as idols... juz pure 'kiddish'? I shall list out my past idols....

From the day i noe that there is M-Pop, which i think 10 yrs old? YEP, TYL started looking at shuai ges THAT young.

I dun remember when, but 小虎队 and LA boyz songs were always in my THEN ULTIMATE LUXURY walkman. At that time CD was a damn high class stuff, so i only got cassette tape. The walkman was a gift i got passed down to me from my dad. If i still have it nw, it is ANTIQUE!

At 11-12 yr old, due to the influenced of my classmates, i started collecting stuff of my THEN idol - Leon Lai. Dun ask me y i liked him tt time. till nw i still wondered Y. mayb it was coz i felt tt he looked like my THEN fave cousin, and my classmates were wooing and ahhhing over some idol, i cannot lose out, so i mentioned Leon, and well, juz like tt he became my 1st idol. (年少无知) I even asked my dad to get his CD for me. I still remember, i had that 今夜你会不会来album.

That was the period of time when the 四大天王(Jacky Cheung, Aaron Kwok, Andy Lau and Leon Lai) and 四小天王 (Jimmy Lin, Nicky Wu, Takeshi Kaneshiro, Alec Su) were so popular. everyone juz go crazy with wither on of them or all of them.

Actually, i liked Andy Lau, but coz at that pt of time, leon, being my so-called idol, was always being compared with andy, and plus my bro like andy lau, i always 'reject' any news and pics of andy lau, to show my 'loyalty' to my 'idol'. (that was juz plain toopid)

During my Sec sch to JC days, I could remember who was i crazy with. But one for sure is Jeff Chang. His songs touched me even up till now. He is one of the talented singers i idolised, (TYL dun juz look at pretty faces guys nia, i appreciate talent too.) I got most of the albums he cut at that period of time: 宽容(1995)、梦想(1996)、挚爱(1997)、选哲精选辑(1997)、直觉(1997)、信仰(2000)、从开始到现在(2002)。Yes, this was how i love Jeff. i think he is the only idol i have so many albums de. wahahahaa

2002 - 2003, idol drama was a great hit and slowly all the boy bands were all coming out. 1st, F4 due to Meteor Garden series. They were the start of pretty face boybands in M-pop, and yes, TYL was once crazy over them, to the extend of queuing up for half a day (i got my resources nt to Q for days) for Vanness Wu autograph for his 1st album.

2003 - 2005 yr old, Jay Chou became VERY popular, and i got his VERY 1st album (a gift frm my cousin) and the talented grp, Tension (it's a pity this grp didnt last long). Then comes 5566, Energy! I was crazy over 5566, i would save up and buy the albums and merchandise. I got their 一光年, Boyfriend 挚爱 (2 editions), C'est Si Bon, Mr Fighting OST, 好久不见 and 喝彩。At the same time, TYX was crazy with Energy (with Toro and 牛奶), so u can imagine, how well we noe their songs at THAT time. but coz after Toro then subsequently 牛奶 left, we grew out of them le. As for 5566, the last 2 albums were not as nice as the 1st few, and slowly they spent their time on other areas other than singing, we also stop following.

2005-2009, Fahrenheit (飞轮海) came into the M-pop pic and sad to say, yes this is another pretty face boyband TYL was crazy with. I got pics of them everywhere, even on my office desktop. I was especially in love with Jiro Wang. Coz he reminded me of someone. Once i told that someone i was different frm her (who happen to like Fahrenheit too), as i noe him 1st, and coz of him i liked Fahrenheit - Jiro, but she likes Jiro 1st b4 she met him. Well, that was the past... so nw, the craze died down le.

Proud to say that, apart from the boys, TYL oso spend time looking at girls. SHE when they 1st appear in 2001, TYL oso follow all their news and albums. :)

As for now, i wun be as crazy, but still there are a bunch of ppl i adore, admire, idolised! wahhaa.. i will never say NO to Mayday (dunno when did i start liking them, but once start u cant stop), Show Luo, Rainie Yang, Jeff Chang, SHE, Zhang Yun Jing (She is damn shuai and cute!!!!!), Liang Wen Ying (Coz she is oso LWY? wahaha). and i wld not say no to handsome guys or nice music!

不知道从几时开始，我已经不再追看偶像剧；浪漫爱情小说也不再吸引我。是怎么了？我长大了？！ 哈哈。。。 可能吧。到了这把年纪还有少女浪漫幻想或许太可悲了吧。很多身边的朋友都会很开心，我终于长大了！ 哈哈。。。曾经就有朋友阻止我看偶像剧和爱情小说，她说就是因为受到影响，所以渴望梦幻般的爱情，对于爱情的要求特别高，结果怎样都找不到男朋友。几年前的我，也许就是这样吧。现在的我，选择性的远离爱情。

看见周围的朋友都在爱情里受尽了折磨，我为何还自讨苦吃？最近又好多朋友，不管是很亲近的，还是比较不熟的； 不管是男的、还是女的都在爱里受伤。分手的分手、悔婚的悔婚、后悔结婚的后悔结婚、说不爱了就不爱了。。。　不管是爱情长跑５年以上还是在一起一年以上。。。都敌不过变心。说什么天长地久、说什么海枯石烂、说什么永远、说什么一辈子的承诺、说什么至死不渝的爱。。。到头来，说变心就变心、说不爱就不爱、说分手就分手。有没有想过另一方的感受？请到深处时，对方伤风，你就会觉得呼吸困难；要分手时，对方在你面前的伤痛，你们却感受不到。爱情就那么脆弱吗？

我不知道自己有没有曾经深爱过；不过我很肯定我有很受伤过。。这种痛真的笔墨难形容。那种心就好像被揪在一起的痛、坐着都好像会窒息而死、走路像行尸走肉般、整个世界好像都塌了下来。我想这种痛，谁都不愿受到第二次。偏偏我让我自己第二次受到伤害。。。　真是可悲。。好累。。　看到周围的人，加上自己所受的伤。。。我真的不想再接近这所谓甜蜜、让人便美的爱情。如果变美丽的代价就是要面对着种种伤害，我宁可丑一辈子。至少我会很开心自在。不会为了另一个人有没有想你、是不是也一样爱着你、有没有背叛你、有没有照顾自己而烦恼！

有一本小说里，男主角说道∶“男人说爱你，当下真的是爱你的。”　就是这一秒说爱你，真的是爱你的。只不过，下一秒也许就变心了。人生还真的变化无常啊！

人最厉害的就是帮自己找借口。再牵强的理由都能说出了来。只要感情淡了、不爱了、想分手了。。。什么理由都有。

看了这么多，那些梦幻似的爱情、那些浪漫、感人的爱情对我来说就是戏剧。再也不是现实、我更不可能渴望的到。我不相信爱、更不对爱没信心。。男人，我照看；我照玩；但我绝对不可能再爱、更不可能放下心防再去爱。也许某天，有人能让我对爱情的看法改变，或是能让我有信心。但绝对不是现在！近期内，不可能会有我的喜讯吧。:)

Results for my 1st paper is out. It is a B+! haha.. i'm satisfied with this result. Coz i didnt aim high. Juz a middle range pass would be enough...

2nd paper juz finished, and now i'm preparing for a test on tues. But it seems sooo unproductive. i juz cant get the facts into my head... haiz.. no matter wat, i muz force myself to do it.

Last thurs, went KTV with my classmates after exam. I knew some of the guys can sing... but i didnt noe most of them CAN REALLY SING! OMG! i enjoyed every moment even when i'm not singing. jus sitting down and listen to them sing is a pleasure.

normally, most guys i noe, either dunno hw to sing or dun dare to sing. simon and darren aside... they are my ktv kakis... hehee but they are juz sooooooo superb.... haha i told eric i gonna bring him to ktv pub to show off le... wahahaha...

well, though i didnt get to be the same class as wy... i'm still happy! coz i LOVE my class! they are constantly amazing my with new things... wahahaha...

ok back to notes.. SIANESS!

Life in sch is getting chaotic... endless reports, then b4 u noe it... time for exam... sometime, i wonder... y m i rushing like mad? wat is the purpose? i didnt learn anything in this rush accept to meet datelines... oh yeah.. and think for a title for the report...

last week... i was rushing report till i didnt get enough slp.. i think the average slping time for the whole week is 3 hrs? haiz.. slp... my slp.... my bed....

i didnt noe i was stress... i tot i was only rushing out the report.. not stress... till one day, when i closed my eyes... i saw numbers... all the stuff i have calculated... all the facts and experimental errors... i cant slp peacefully.... then i noe.. I WAS STRESSED! sianz...

i realised being buried under piles of work and being stress didnt help in 4getting the past and ppl... in fact it made u miss the person more... at least for my case.... n I HATE IT! y muz my brain allow him to come into my mind?! i tot he is out of my mind for quite some time le?

yes... the more i stress.. the more i kana buried under the mountains of work.. the more i missed him... i missed his voice... giving the motivation to hang on, encouraging me to continue walking... i missed his encouraging and reassuring hug.. giving me strength.... i missed his failed attempts to made me laugh... and made me 4got watever was bothering me.... even juz his presence... oso could make me feel better... EEEKKKK.... y like tt?! i dun want it! i dun wanna be such a weakling!

i cant go find him... no way i gonna start running in circles again... no i cant call him.. coz i will want more than juz call. no, i cant do anything!!!! i juz cant do anything except to force him out of my mind! i hate him, i hate myself! i wanna ALT CTR DEL!

I've totally understand wat WY had been thru for the past 2 yrs! WY, so sorry that we werent THAT understanding.. i mean we understand ur situation, but then we did give you some pressure to a certain extend. Nw i can fully understand wat u had been thru, hw u were being torn between frens and sch.

DEAR family and frens,

The course I'm studying nw is call a CRASH course. That is why at the end of the 2 years, we can get bachelor with honors. It will take about 4 yrs to finish exactly the same course in NZ. My course is not what you all think about the REAL university life, where ppl are leading carefree life and enjoying every moment of it (even if u all are rushing for reports or mugging). We cant planned our time -table to our liking, nor we can bargain the due dates with the lecturers. Our one day of lectures is equivalent to 1 week of lectures in NZ. and yep, the WHOLE DAY. Dun be amazed tt the lecturer could finish at least 2 -3 chapters or even a half of a particular module a day.

We are all absorbing as much information as we can. coz by the end of the month, it will be the final exam of the module. PLUS, due to my course of study, we have a lot of lab work which required us to write report, and the longest due date given was 2 weeks. we had 1 which required us to hand in the report the very next day.

It is NOT that i wanna act hardworking or wat. It's i have no choice! TYL is famous of being a slacker, i'll slack every chance i have, BUT i cant! This is the choice i've made, i need to accept it. SO i may not be able to join the gatherings or slacking sessions as frequently. STILL, i tried to be there as many sessions as possible.

TYL is oso famous of MIA in class, but not this time round. Coz every min counts in the lecture. Last time, I MIA, i can juz self study i can fully understand and do well in exams. But this time round, i need to listen to absorb. Say tt i'm old liao, brain function not as well as last time and it is a long time since i last STUDIED for real. So I'm trying to absorb.

PLUS, TYL dun have any savings(serve me right), so now without work, my only source of income is from tuition. My time is divided for tuitions, reports and classes... n i dun really have any more time left.

I'm glad tt most ppl ard me are very understanding. However, i noe it is frustrating when i kept saying i not free, got test, need to do report blah blah blah... and can be very annoying when it comes to arranging time /slots.

Juz wanna let u all noe, it is NOT tt i wanna act hardworking or trying to SHOW OFF tt i'm REALLY bz with sch.. it is really I've NO CHOICE.

I've chose to come back to sch, i dunno if i'm able to survive these 2 yrs or do well... but i wanna do my best, at least i will not live with regrets in future.

Thanks ppl, for ur utmost understanding...

No matter how stress and 'xiong' the sch life is, we still made frens. I realised that I have yet introduced my new found classmates. hahaha... yep, they are funny, and cute. and most of them are just so young. TYX cant get away from ppl born in 1983, i cant get away from ppl born in 1987.

The guys in my class are of tyx's age, the girls are younger.

These are my 'clique' in sch. We have lunch together, sit together in class and go crazy in class. oh yeah, and read 'My Paper'. wahahhaa... so cute, pretty and funny.

Huijuan, the girl elder than me, she is brave to give up her career for studies.

The girls, most are TP students, they are clever, hardworking and pretty... hahaaa... they will ku zhong dai le...

These are the guys in my class. They are funny guys who never fail to amaze me with their "inner" talents. They can mimic lecturers so well that they tok in their slang/accent/ with their styles.

Some are just humorous. hahahaa..

went out with them last night, enjoyable! hahaha.. so these bunch of didis and meimeis are fun loving afterall... juz pray hard this course dun made us lose all the fun! :)

wooo.. i didnt noe it has been so long since i last posted an entry... well... life have been so bz lor...
Official start of the degree programme... a test every 2 weeks.. (in fact, i juz finished my 2nd test for the mth juz now), reports to be handed in the next day after practical... time juz fly pass...
next week.. i'll be off for study week... yes, my 1st exam.. 30th Sep... then 1st oct will start a new paper (known as module in SG context)... Crazy life....

last weekend i went to Crown Plaza hotel with my fave ppl... hahhaah thanks to cheryl for her invite... hehhehe... yesh.. i got a test today, i still spend my sat playing and staying overnight.. coz the place is juz superb!!! my rotters, yt and cheryl (it has been a looooong time since we last rot like tt?)... went for a swim at the wonderful pool, and slack at the lounge with free flow of alcohol and finger foods (not those frozen then fried stuff, are REAL cheese with crackers, nice cookies, etc) imagine u are seeping wine and eating cheese with crackers... with ppl u love so much ard u... HEAVENLY!!!!! ok.. i did 4got i got test at tt pt of time.. hheheheee

back to reality... time to go for lab.... then tuition then slack tonight!!! hehehehee :p

It is a long time since i last enjoyed myself this much! after much consideration, i decided not to go for my sch's welcome bbq and went over to GK 7th mth celebration. and i didnt regret it!!!!!!

when i reached wdl, simon came out and drove me in. When i stepped into GK, and walked into the event area, i didnt expect anything but juz 'hi' frm various ppl. coz the event this time round was quite 'sane' - not like past yrs, where all of ur running ard shouting and making ppl to bottoms up. they were all sitting at their respective tables eating and drinking normally.

I walked in, 受到明星般的欢迎，真的受宠若惊. i didnt expect it to be soooooooo.... overwhelming? *i can use this word rite?*, anyway, ppl frm pdtn, frm sales side surrounded me, pulling me to their tables... simon was beside me, pulling me away frm them, (i felt like superstar, wahahaha), then asmine came in and i hid behind asmine...

Then i started to run ard, saying hi made tons of noise. proud to say, 本来沉闷的地方，被我炒热了！！！hahaha.. ok, i admit i was damn noisy... but this type of function need to be as noisy as possible de mah... :p but, call me any names... but i really like the 'welcome' feeling...

as usual, drinks are widely available.. this time, there is Hoegaarden.... Woooo.... no one sang ktv, so i start the ball rolling, then can sang duet with Simon! LOVE IT!!!!

but ppl started to go off ard 7plus, b4 8, only left me, kelvin and de hua. Steven was drunk le, so we asked a colleague to send him back. then we left GK.

Kelvin and i felt tt it was still early, 8plus nia... and we haven reach our quota for drinks. so last min, kelvin asked me if i wanna go over to tony's coffeeshop there to eat and drink. and boom.. we were there with tony and ah yeo... we drank and eat (yes, the food there is 1000000000 x better than GK de buffet).... we chat till 11 plus.. soooooo happy... with them, no matter hw much u drink, u wun feel terrible or drunk... u juz feel happy.... :p

I was ultimate late for class today! coz of tt toopid bus! damn irritated with the bus! waited for half an hr, then 3 buses came tgt. damn!! and this is not the 1st time. TYX oso faced the same prob!!!! she left hse 1.5 hrs b4 me!!! the bus is already taking its own sweet time!!!

i'm sooooo gonna to write a complain letter to SMRT!!!!

Have been logging into blogger, but end up didnt update. Ok, time to update...

3 weeks of sch... gonna be the final week, then my degree preparation program will come to an end. Next mth, is the REAL thing, the start of my 2 years journey....

nw then i truly understand y wy told me she cant cfm dates with us when she was in Massey for the 1st few mths. They LOVE last min stuff... last min changed of time table, last min addition of workshops... NEVER one day i can go back on time... end up i have to rush for my tuition.... headache...

Good news.. NONE of my classmates can guess my actual age!!! hehheehee.. ALL to i'm born in 1986... woooo... actually... i'm 21 every yr... ehehhe... cool.... my classmates are actually interesting and quite good as of now.... and got shuai ge to see (wy drooling over him).... not bad lor.... hehehehe.... tt shuai ge is not my dish... he seems too guai... but he got a great body and nice tan color... :)

i always wonder.... have i changed? or will i change? is it for the better or for the worse? i've seen changes ard me... some are for the better, some are for the worse.. WU NAI!!! heard stories of a good fren... he was once such a good buddy... wat caused him to changed? dunno.. maybe his new gf? haiz... well... ppl changed every min.. we have to accept it... no matter wat rite?

Sch has started for 4 days... and there is no ONE single day tt i'm not rushing. NOT late for sch, is late for tuition.

timetable stated 5pm to end. but dunno y it can drag till 6sth. Nw i undestand y wy always told me they cannot cfm, coz dunno wat time sch end. FULLY UNDERSTAND!

Assignments piled up. I've handled in 1-2 liao, nw doing the 3rd 4th 5th... wooo.. wat i got myself into?! i'm looking fwd to weekends!

To my surprise, i got 2 girls in my class who happened to be my proj students for SFMA competition for 2 different yrs! cool rite! one moment, i was supervising them, next moment, we become classmates... wahahaha

2nd day of sch, i've met him. i stunned, dunno wat to do... i juz stunned and stared for 3 secs. my mind went blank. he nudged me, i juz mumbled a bye, and went off.... i didnt tok to him... dunno wat to say.... but when he nudged me... i realised hw much i missed his arms... (sounds wrong?) wahahaha... well, back to REALITY! tyl muz work hard... stop think those idiotic stuff :p

1st Aug - Last day of taka fair!

Old liao... work for 2 weeks with breaks in the middle i oso wanna die liao... wahahaha... but to think of the $$... ok lah...

@ taka, hunks and babes are in every corner... so cool... it is a pleasure to my eyes lor...

saw Kym Ng, Joanne Peh on separate occasions... noe a few more ah boys (the promoters)... wahahaa

2nd Aug - 1st day of sch! I pray tt everything will go well and smooth!!!

It marks the starting of my student life of 2 yrs!!!

Gambatte!

The time table is out.
wooo... and it is getting nearer and nearer to my dream of getting a degree...

It is so exciting yet scary...


the 1st lect/test is BIOCHEM by TSA!!! haiz... make me wonder....biochem is my killer!! TSA is my killer lect! haven start yet, i see my 死期... hw?! hw??

TYL, u can de.. jia you jia you jia you!!!

Have been clearing my desk, re-arranging my lecture notes during poly time... and I found this - an assignment for Effective Communication Skills - Journal Practice.

My Regret

I have a very good male friend. He was always there for me when I needed him. He accompanied me when I was lonely; he listened to all my grumbles; he made me laugh when I was too stress up; coaxed me to sleep in sleepless nights; gave me a warm hug when I was helpless. I felt that I was fortunate to find someone who was so nice to me.

One day, he told me that he wanted to go and stayed over at his friend's house for overnight computer games, so he could not accompany me the day after. The first thing that came to his mind was that he wanted to join his friends as they were all staying over for a night of games. He felt that cancelling our meeting that day was not a big deal. But I lost my temper the moment he told me he was cancelling the meeting, as the first thing that flashed in my mind was that I was less important than his friends; that I was nothing to him. I shouted at him, saying that he only came to me when he needed my help and all sorts of accusations. He tried to reason with me, explained to me. However, I was too angry to think rationally. I refused to listen to him and even hanged up on him.

In the end, he stopped contacting me for a few days. Actually, he did not contact me because he knew that I was still mad and nothing he said could get into my head, so he let me cool down first before he contacted me. At that time, my mind was telling me that he really did not treat me as a special friend; I was just a normal friend to him. He did not care if I was hurt or angry. I could not control myself, so I called and scolded him for being heartless, and insensitive. I told him that I was stupid to think that I was important to him. I was very unreasonable.

He was angry, and shouted at me. He asked why I was so unreasonable. Why I was putting so much to the situation? If I was not important to him, why would he bother to be there for me whenever I needed someone? I kept quiet because I was scared as he never shouted at me before. I realised that I was too irrational; I did not cool myself down to think properly. I let my automatic thoughts rule me and caused the fight. I apologised. He told me that my words were hurtful, and I should think about his feelings too.

After that incident, we were back to normal. Too bad, I did not really learn from this mistake, similar incidents happened a few more times. We are not close anymore.

Now, I have learned that I should not let the illogical me to rule me. I should have cooled myself down, clarified things with him in a peaceful manner. I should not have accused him and should not assume things. If I had thought first before I acted, I would tell him that I was not stopping him to be with his friends. It was just that I felt hurt when he cancelled the meeting that was decided a few days ago because his friend invited him last minute. Maybe thing would not have turned so ugly.

After reading this, the 1st thing i tot... WAH, I HANDED THIS TYPE OF WORK IN?!??! OMG!

1. The English sucks (and I realised that there were a few mistakes that my tutor didnt mark me down), i'm like marking my student's work, which i would blow my top! and to think tt my tutor gave me 74%. wahaha

2. How childish can I be?! OMG!! just coz of this incident.. i can create such a big woo haa!? wah!! Amazing!

but well... these are the memories that are so close to ur heart.. wahaha.. if not for this entry... i dun think i would even remember this had happened(till now i still cant recall exactly hw this incident happened). hmmm... i muz have felt terrible at tt time ba...

this oso proved one thing.. no matter hw hurtful/painful at tt pt... u will 4get eventually.. this entry was 4-5yrs ago.. wahaha...

I noe i'm slow... it has been more than a yr since she 1st started out as a contestant in Taiwan's SuperIdol 2008 (超级偶像2008), and nw her 2nd album 《相反的我》is already out.

I knew that there is this particular singer tt had created a big woo haa throughiut the contest, however i wasnt really into it, and the only song i noe was 《黑裙子》, ending song of 《敲敲爱上你》. Ivan was the one who 1st intro this song to me, and i was attracted to her vocal (i tot it was a guy initally), but again, i didnt really research on her. only noe that she is not those girly type.

I only REALLY get noe to her when i watched 娱乐百分百(100% Entertainment) recently. She was cute, shuai, funny... wooo... then i did an intense research on her. Starting to get to noe more abt her, and followed her clips during her contest. SHE WAS SUPERB during the contest. Now i understant y she was the 人气王 and sebsequently the Champion! She cried when she tok abt her ex and dedicate a song 《黑色幽默》to the ex... she showed ppl the 'Man' side of hers, the 'gentle' side, the 'cute' side, the 'Rocker' side, the 'funny' side... she is juz someone i looking out for for a BF!! wahahaha...

Oops.. i 4got to tell you who is she...

相反的我宣传照

Name: Zhang Yun Jing (Jing)
Chinese: 张芸京(original name 张芸菁)
Nickname: 京爷、阿京
DOB: 6/9/1983
1st album - 2009 《破天荒》
《破天荒》，《黑裙子》，《让我照顾你》 are a few songs i like in the album.
2nd album - 2010 《相反的我》
currently i like《坏了》, wait till i finish listening to the whole album! wahahaha...

So, she is my latest idol! my latest obession!!! wahahahahaa

Information from Chinese Wikipedia-Zhang Yun Jing
New Album《相反的我》can get from haoting.com - Zhang Yun Jing

Woo.. bdae is over...haiz... sadz... but i've enjoyed myself sooooo much... thank you everyone who made it happened and oso those who remembered and left a msg somewhere... wahahaha...

i went to sooooo many different rest.. tasted so many different kinds of food for this bdae....

29th June - outing with my office gang - Kelvis, yan, lihua, tricia, bingxiong. and TYX (she seems to appear in most of the celebration outings... wahahahaa)

Had our dinner @ SBW Bai Mi Fen (it is nice.. go try.. close on Wed)

Then we brought our Uncle Kelvis to MOF for desserts... wahahha...

This is wat my gang get for me.... :)

8th July - start of the official celebration... Steamboat dinner @ Fat Fish Rest on top the SBW hill... Old Nelson rd with 5G1u and YT... yes.. my fave gang.. as usual... it was filled with fun and laughter... just love spending time with them... anything will taste nice... :p

9th July - Out with dinner with my cute family. We had dinner @ Pu Tian Rest in JP. Yes, the food is nice, service is nt bad. and Thank lyn for ur bdae gift. :)

TYX was busier than me. We had Seoul Garden with Harris in the afternoon, then she went to JP for Ice Cream, then had dinner with us. See... i think it is more of her bdae.... wahahahhaa... :p

This Esprit Collection watch is DAMN EXPENSIVE is from my beloved TYX and TYW... Thanks darlings.... This is an automatic watch... it is juz soooooo coool.... wahahahaa...

10th July - TYX (see.. she is the fixed Guest of most of the celebrations) and I went down Taka to take a look at the booth Lion City have selling smoothie and some GK products... then met up with Kelvis and went to have a late lunch @ Kelvis and TYX's latest fave - Geylang 田鸡粥...

then after tt we met up with HJM, Cheryl for dinner @ Tampopo at Liang Court. It is super nice.... we had our fair share of Black pig there.. wahahahaa....

Then we went chilling out @ Helipad... cool place.. but nt really high enough wo... but the company counts!!! hehehee

Then we went back home for cake cutting session... so many ppl was at my hse... my bro's frens, colleague and his daughter... so nice of them.... THANKS everyone... then HJM stayed to watch World Cup 3rd placing match (Germany won!!!!!) wooooooo

11th July (actual day) - We went for our long awaited KTV @ Clementi Party World.... cool leh... wahahaha... then yp came in with bdae cake.. actually come to think of it... we RARELY meet up each other le.. everyone so bz with everything....

anyway, after tt we attended yingxiu's wedding... our yingxiu is the 1st to get married in our poly gang!!!! she was sooooo gorgeous... wahahhaa...

That almost wrap up my bdae celebration... hahaha

Oh ya... recieved a special sms frm Simon (GK), he 自弹自唱 Happy birthday song for me... so nice of him... hehehee..

he always will send me a song sang by him.... it is juz so nice.. it is like he will noe hw i felt at tt pt of time.. 他的歌有时真的有疗伤的作用。。。 :)

Life after the offical off...

2nd day, went for my long awaited hair treatment + hair cut.... (i got a new hairstyle... and a new color.. wahahaha),
I wanted Hebe short hairstyle, but my hairstylist told me.. Hebe got professional to help her maintain, and for my character, i will not maintain it de... so she decided to give me a similar, yet easy to maintain (dun even need to comb my hair after wake up! hahahaa) style...

so half of my day is spent sitting in the saloon, highlighting my hair, then scalp treatment then cut hair.... she asked her assistant to help to hightlight my hair 1st. He is cute... if u really go observe him, he will sometime give tiny tiny expression... which made him even cuter (ok... i got soft spots for guys whose actions are cute)... anyway, initially i kept quiet and read my book (and took occassional looks at him)... but i think he was those chatty type.. he started to tok to me... i entertained him initially... slowly it became a chat..

when he washed my hair.. he was gentle... making sure i was comfortable... and water temp is ok for me.. and he didnt wet my own tee... these are juz normal service provide by any saloon... nth to ooooo and ahhhh over rite?? there are more....

I was doing my hair treatment... coz this treament they use is very cooling.. will make u feel very cold de... he told me if i feel cold muz tell him... i told him i'm ok... i was freezing cold... n i think he noticed my goosebumps.. he told me once he finished applying, he will give me an apron...
he took the apron, then blow it with the hair dryer (i tot he was blowing off the loose hair on it... but NO! he blew it, so the apron will be warm when he covered it around me!!! coz he did it twice.. the 2nd time he did the same thing with a new apron) soooooo sweet rite??

then he told me he changed a warm tea for me.
then i heard it... someone called him... guess wat is his name... he is called DESMOND! hahaha.... of all names.... anyway, he seems like a playful boy.. he will distrub his colleagues.. his smile... his gentle tone.... *meltz*

after my stylist finished cutting my hair... she went to attend to other ppl, he came n helped me brushed off the loose hair... then he went and get a piece of tissue paper for me... to brush off the loose hair on my face.... so 贴心... hahahhaa...

I'll go there more frequent for my treatments liao.. wahahahahhaa

Ok... as requested... 5g1u meeting CONFIRMED! hehehee

PS PS... it is really abit small.. hopefully this is big enough... abit blur though... :p

It is the time of the year! The year's biggest event is just round the corner! Book ur dates early... not necessary 1st come 1st serve.... wahahahaha... Please look at the dates tt are being booked currently....

I’ve found a song specially dedicated to all my frens who were being hurt in love….
It is from SHE’s new album – SHERO, 爱就对了 (Just Love)

Click here to play the song

Below are the lyrics, juz in case some of my ‘potato’ frens need help in explaining the lyrics… I will do a direct translation….my ‘england’ not tt good.. I will still try my best lah.. wahahaha

总是要流一些滚烫热泪
we always need to shed some tears
才能换来对于爱的体会
in order to understand love
你看 世界没有毁灭 心也没有碎
you see, the world is not destroyed, your heart didn’t shuttered into pieces
其他的就交给时间解决
others, just let time to settle it

你当然可以重新再爱
of coz u can love again
受过伤的更懂怎样爱与被爱
u will noe better hw to love or to be loved after being hurt
所以 别再理有他的回忆 有空再回忆
so dun care about memories with him, think abt it when u free
离开你的只有他 但是爱还在
he left u, but not the love

听我说 爱是对的
listen to me, love is right
错的是我们还没学会爱
the problem is that we haven learn all about love
就急着爱人 而爱错人
then eager to love someone, in the end loving the wrong one
可是 爱就对了 遇到下一个
but just love, when u meet the next one
爱上就爱了 痛苦或快乐 都是获得
just love, happy or misery, it is still sth for us

我当然经历过你现在的感受
of coz, I’ve been thru the feelings u r feeling nw
我想那是人必经的折磨 Yeah~
I think this is a necessary torture we need to go thru in life
也许每个人都该是某个人 成长的助手
mayb everyone is someone’s aid to grow up
受一点苦痛 帮助她成熟
abit of pain and hurt, help her to be more mature

听我说 爱是对的
listen to me, love is right
错的是我们还没学会爱
the problem is that we haven learn all about love
就急着爱人 而爱错人
then eager to love someone, in the end loving the wrong one
可是 爱就对了遇到下一个
but just love, when u meet the next one
爱上就爱了痛苦或快乐 都是获得
just love, happy or misery, it is still sth for us

别探听他的线索 别等待他会回头
no need to noe hw is he, dun wait for him to turn back
爱~ 不喜欢看人软弱 L
OVE ~ dun like to see ppl weaken
别继续把心封锁 别躲在伤心里头
dun lock up ur heart, dun bury urself in misery
爱来了别错过
dun miss out love

听我说 爱是对的
listen to me, love is right
错的是我们还没学会爱
the problem is that we haven learn all about love
就急着爱人 而爱错人
then eager to love someone, in the end loving the wrong one
可是 爱就对了 遇到下一个
but just love, when u meet the next one
爱上就爱了痛苦或快乐 都是获得
just love, happy or misery, it is still sth for us
听我说 爱是对的
listen to me, love is right
错的是别人自以为懂爱
ppl tot tt they know love, but they are wrong
才会又爱人 又伤害人
that’s why they will love the person in one hand, yet hurt that person on the other
可是 爱就对了
but just love
爱了就值得 爱这门功课
is worth it... Love, this kind of assignment
艰深但快乐 爱就对了
strong and deep but happy, just love

听我说 爱是对的
listen to me, love is right
错的是别人自以为懂爱
ppl tot tt they know love, but they are wrong
才会又爱人 又伤害人
that’s why they will love the person in one hand, yet hurt that person on the other
可是 爱就对了
but just love
爱了就值得 爱这门功课
is worth it. Love, this kind of assignment
艰深但快乐 爱就对了
strong and deep but happy, just love
爱来了就别错过
dun miss out love

Suddenly the song is not as nice after adding in the english part... quite 'chui' leh.. wahahahaha.. the chinese lyrics really meaningful... try reading it ba... :)

I went out shopping @ JP on Sat with Yan yan... she cant find a suitable pair of shoes... or shld i say she got no luck.. coz every shoes she tried.. they were either not her size, or didnt have stock.... tough luck...

yes, in the process of accompanying her... i found a pair of sandals tt i like... so i bought it.. yes.. i shld be saving $$$... but then i really need sandals.. coz i dun have any left!!! :p
then we each bought a watch..... *i need watch too, mine all spoilt*

the next day, i went Batu Pahat (i 4got hw it spelled, but i guessed most of u will noe.. ivan's fave place), then i got another 1 sandals and 1 heels (cant help it... it was cheap.. n sponsored by my parents)....

New Watch

My 3 pairs of new sandals

Then coz ate too much and too oily the day b4... my stomach was giving me trouble on mon, thus i was on MC... went to the doc, then to CWP meet yt for lunch... she changed her hp (Finally)... but i think yx was more excited than her... anyway, we were walking ard looking at diamonds.. and fall in love with some of them... erm.. yt asked me to buy for her.. in order for me to buy for her, i need ppl to buy for me 1st.. wahahaha... anyway, THE DAY is near liao... can start thinking le leh...

Both are from Citigems - Perfect Love series $158 and $398 respectively... nice nice rite?? hmmm.. i was telling everyone, i got no $$ to buy.. so look at the pics... hehe... or else now GSS leh.. i sure buy one de... i bought 2 for myself le... :X ever since i started work... :p

This is from Gold Heart Rosella, nice rite? but i 4got the price le.. i think is quite steep... wahahahaha...

Finally, this is wat TYX likes.. hahaha.. i helping her to advertise to ppl oso.. :p

SG Food Expo is finally over... This yr seem extremely tired and shag.. y? no energy, no fun, no excitment, no alcohol, no team spirit, no sales....

07, 08, 09 (09 was the peak) were so much fun and laughter and craziness... those were the days... the team spirit.. i dun think any of the vendors there could fight.... but this yr... promoters r demure... and dun dare to push nor play... so end up leaving me, tyx and kelvis who were crazy... can u imagine hw bad it was??? even kelvis and steven came out to sell!!!

Normally they were juz hanging ard inside waiting to top up stocks... or to prepare samples... this yr, they were out to sell!!! can u imagine hw bad sales were? and the new promoters totally dun have team spirit... and some of them juz cant play!!!

2009 was the peak... we can actually finish everything by 7... and packed up... while others trying to sell and earn the last few bucks... those were the days.. where salesmen and promoters tgt have the fighting spirit... where the mgmts give worker the motivation to fight on... things changed over 1 yr...

Food Expo 2008....sometimes.. we juz cant win time..

Food Expo 2009

There are changes every min and sec... so wat can we do?? juz learn to accept and adapt... life still goes on....

I drank almost 8 cups of milk tea ( UNWILLINGLY), causing me now wide awake!!! damn!

anyway, i recieved a piece of good news.. Yingxiu is getting married! and guess wat? her wedding day is on my bdae!! hahhaha... so cool rite??? BUT 1 big prob... SHLD i go anot? this is the qns...

y i dun feel like going?
1. I'm broke
2. It's my bdae! (though tyx said NO ONE will ask me out tt day!)
3. I dun wanna see him

Y i wanna go?
1. Coz she is the 1st in SP Clique to get married
2. coz i can meet up with frens i didnt meet for quite some time
3. Coz i got a dress for her wedding (hahaha yes.. i noe it she getting married tis yr.. so bought a dress durning CNY)
4. if i dun go, wy will not go, ly sure not go.. then seems not nice...

well... i was giving advice to ppl ard me when it come to matters of heart.. yet i myself am facing this prob... toopid rite?

Oh ya... another thing.. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN GUYS' MINDS!?!? On the same day, i got some rxn frm two guy buddies of mine tt made me sooo damn annoyed!

1. i was at SP collecting my offer letter and stuff with tyx. then we had lunch in SP juz so happen tt it was the same place where my two buddies were having lunch. Female buddy noe i was there.. and was so excited tt came by a few times juz to make some noise.

Male buddy was no where be seen, so i decided to call him( he ALWAYS sounded excited when i was in sch). he didnt sound happy tt i was near him, nor he sounded excited... me, being me... i juz feel tt mayb he had a bad day.. and was having lunch with some big shots... so cannot sound too informal... so i juz brushed off the feeling of being 敷衍.

then he was almost near my table when he went to take some food... he didnt even bother to come by and say hi... which was sooooooo not him.. i didnt take it at heart actually.. but then when i left the place, the more i recall tt scenerio, the more disappointed i'm... so.. even a hi is a chore to him? well... suan liao lah..

2. I sms this guy buddy, he didnt reply (ok, he might be bz); then i called him ah hr later after i smsed.... (he didnt pick up, which was soooo not him. HE WOULD NEVER MISSED A CALL UNLESS HE WANNA DO IS PURPOSELY.) again, me being me, i juz think tt he left his phone on his desk, and he was somewhere else... but he didnt return call or reply sms (which he NEVER did tt to me)...

i got a strong feeling someone told him sth tt is nt true tt caused his rxn.. i cant say i noe this buddy inside out.. but i def noe hw he reacts to certain things... DAMN HIM! hw can he so nt trust his buddy, me!?!? i tot we r always partners in crime!? n i totally no image in front of him de lor... if there is possibility.. WHY THE HELL AM I NOT CARING MY IMAGE!?
toopid man! eeeeek.. 让别人有机可乘！真是个笨蛋！让人挑拨！
TYL will not be so toopid like u lah!

Found this on my Chinese Blog... this is 生命的无奈？ hahahaa,..

世界上最远的距离
不是 生与死的距离
而是 我站在你面前 你不知道我爱你
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 我站在你面前 你不知道我爱你
而是 爱到痴迷 却不能说我爱你
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 我不能说我爱你
而是 想你痛彻心脾 却只能深埋心底
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 我不能说我想你
而是 彼此相爱 却不能够在一起
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 彼此相爱 却不能够在一起
而是 明知道真爱无敌 却装作毫不在意
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 树与树的距离
而是 同根生长的树枝 却无法在风中相依
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 树枝无法相依
而是 相互了望的星星 却没有交汇的轨迹
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 星星之间的轨迹
而是 纵然轨迹交汇 却在转瞬间无处寻觅
　　
世界上最远的距离
不是 瞬间便无处寻觅
而是 尚未相遇 便注定无法相聚
　　
世界上最远的距离
是鱼与飞鸟的距离
一个在天，一个却深潜海底

today went to Hotel 81 Selegi with Ivan.... (ivan say muz finish the whole sentence)... to acc him to get shirt frm a tailor... wahahahhaa...

We went to have our dinner at Victor's Kitchen.. This is actually one of my fave place for dim sum... it is REALLY nice... but coz it seems to be out of place and have not been there for quite sometime... i didnt mention it to anyone else until today.

Yes, it was LCM who brought me to this place... and i fall in love with it... the dim sum IS NICE... esp the carrot cake.. and yes.. LCM did da bao all the way back to wdl for me,... juz coz i called him and said i was hungry... hahaha.. i told ivan abt it.. come to think of it.. i was quite demanding then.. ehehehe... hahhaa.. LCM, if u r reading this.. PS lah.. for being so demanding then.... ivan told me... can see tt he is good in his own ways... but well.. hahaha... being frens is still a better choice...

Look at the food we ordered.. nice nice... of coz... the company oso plays a part....

Love toking to Ivan...with him... i can tok non-stop... he allows me to be toopid.. to dream (but he will tell me to stop dreaming), he listens to my most inner tots without condemning me... i can juz tell him everything and anything!!!! wahahahahhaa...

IVAN, LISTEN! u can change everything on u, ur looks, ur voice, ur hairstyle, ur size! but not the inner IVAN i noe... NEVER k?!?! coz i dunno who can allow me to speak so freely liao.. wahahhaa...

btw i found a happy place... it is the soft toys machines arcade @ Marina Sq.... no need to buy or play... juz walk ard... i feel happy.... (ivan say i very easily man zhu... )...

25th anniversary is finally over!!! great! today everyone is on leave... TYL is the only one working in the 1st floor office.. no pdtn today... aiyo... damn sian damn sian damn sian... toopid meeting...

Ppl say no matter what happen outside... u can always fall back onto ur family.. they are ur support... they are the only ones who dun betray u... they are the ones who always be there for u... i never doubt this sentence.. i always have a lovable, supporting family... in fact a lot of ppl envy tt i have such a family... cute daddy mommy, caring bro... lovable sis... wat more can i ask for rite?

BUT u noe... human changed... even ur flesh and blood kin changed... i was looking thru some old photos... i realised tt how happy we were last time... me n my bro were so close... i think we were buddies... even when my sis was born... she didnt break our bond... things changed as u grew up...

we no longer close... we no longer can chat... we are juz merely taking turns to speak... it is so hurtful... i was trying to care... but he doesnt care... i noe he is tired.. he need to work for long hrs... and need to take care a lot of things... but HE is the ONLY one tired??? he work for more than 12 hrs everyday... yep... it is taxing and tiring....but all he thinks tt he is tired? The stress i faced at work, when i need to go tuition straight frm work without dinner...then be stress by students' parents... and worried abt then students... when i have to work at home till wee hrs... this is not tiring.. coz to him.. i'm juz rotting on FB, going out with frens.. lazing ard.... I M ENJOYING LIFE!! while he is slogging all the way... to him, we r juz lazing and wasting our life away, while he is the only one working hard...

i can ask hw is he.... coz he will juz snap at me... i cant concern abt him... coz to him i'm juz digging and nagging and trying to get him into trouble... he seems sick.. juz asked if he is ill... mayb i can cook /made some herbal stuff for him... but wat did he say!?!?! he snap at me!!! i saw tt he anyhow spend money...i nagged at him... he ignored me... m i in the wrong?!?!

i'm here trying ways and means to save and to earn more for my studies... he juz spend his HARD EARNED money like money is juz a few pieces of paper... so i'm in the wrong..
i sensed tt sth is wrong.. i tried to ask... end up... the look on his face... i'm in the wrong again...
i shldnt ask, i shldnt care.. i shldnt do anything... i juz shut up and mind my own business..

so y shld i be sad and lost tt i have a fren who is no longer close to me.. even my own bro oso like tt liao... so i guess... it muz be sth wrong with me... i'm not a gd fren.. i'm nt a gd sis... i'm someone who cant live up to anyone's standards...

i'm hurt.. but .. i have to smile infront of everyone... i'm juz so tired....... really... who noes the stress i'm facing.. the fear... the unforseen future??? sometime i really juz wanna hide in my own shell.. never to come out..

i found a tiny note book, it was a long 4gotten notebook... reading thru it... i realised i had written some meaningful phrases when i read a chinese book. interesting.... muz share share... ehehehe

1. 爱情是一朵在悬崖绝壁边上的花，想摘取就必须要有勇气 ~ 莎士比亚

2. 信，可以挂号；爱情不可能挂号；等久了，人家就不收了。喜欢别藏在心底，一定要大胆告白

3. 不是不爱你，只是懒得说。因为除了爱你，还有更多更多的甜言蜜语，太多太多；所以放在心底，等着你慢慢发现。一举一动里都藏着我的真心，只是懒得说爱你。

4. 人总是有那么几分劣根性，得不到的东西总是最好的。再珍贵的宝贝，等到一拿到手，就被视为破铜烂铁了。

5. 选择你所爱需要成熟的智慧；爱你所选择需要建东的意志。

6. 人与人之间最远的距离不是生死，而是我在你身边你却不知道我的存在。~ 原∶张小娴but it is widely used everywhere

7. 所谓梦想这种东西，是人一辈子也放不了手的

8. 勇气并不会凭空出现，而等待或许会出现好时机，但是更多的时候，是自己创造出来的

9. 喜欢一个人，最好的结果，或许是跟对方在一起；但是在某些情况下，两个人在一起并不一定会幸福，所以他们选择退出、选择遗忘、选择回忆、选择守候。~ one of my faves

10. 记得，别随波逐流的等着幸福来找你，与其往后只剩下回忆，不如现在就拿出勇气

11. 当你发现所喜欢的人喜欢上自己的好朋友，不要退让，而是尽最大的努力试着打动他的心，然后让他做选择，这样，即使心碎，也绝不会后悔。

12. 在感情上，你所要学习的或许是如何使自己更自私的去爱；爱情一旦经过无私的退让或友情的赠与，往往就会因此变质。

13. 难过总会消失，而一定会有某些重要的东西，会永远留在你的记忆里。

14. 天堂不是个地方，它是种感觉。有人并肩牵手、互相陪伴关怀、踏实温暖的感觉

15. 遗憾像是把刀在心底割出一道伤痕；一道无法痊愈的伤痕，总在夜深人静时滴着血。那道伤痕，就叫悔恨。

16. 回忆之所以苦涩是因为思念。因为相思的苦，还有想念的涩。

17. 选择逃避或遗忘过去的伤痛，也许是最好的办法。但是只有选择面对才能成长。

18. 有些东西，即使破损得很严重，或者你认为它根本不再存在了，但这世界上，它永远是那么独一无二、无可取代。~ This is another of my fave

19. 谈恋爱就象写一篇作文，一开始，心里总有自己的架构和计划，只不过，除非动笔，不然你永远不知道，在空白的纸上等待自己的，究竟是什么过程、什么结局。

Woooo.... it has been a bz mth sia... everyday was filled with new 'surprises'.

FHA (Food Hotel Asia) 2010 is on nw tilll Fri.... @ Expo.... yep.. i juz came back frm Expo... and yep, i will be there on the last day too.. 1st day and last day... y? coz i nt pretty lor... tt's y my kelvis kor kor BEARs to let me do ALL the manual work... i got such a wonderful kor rite? wahahahaa

Ok.. Nw the updates.... I've withdrew my part time Adv. Dip. Course... wait... dun start screaming.... coz i got in!! got into Massey Uni! 2 yrs of crazy, no life, stressful (ok, exp + lect frm this course told me, the word stressful is still nt enough to describe it), no money, no nth... only reports, exams and more reports and more exams....

It is a change after 5 yrs.... m i prepared for it? i think i'm .... but u never noe...

the biggest challenge is the money.. 1st i need to save for sch fees, then having no income mthly... i cannot eat watever i like, buy watever i fancy...

yes, i'm excited... and looking fwd... this is gonna be a turning pt in my life.... i no need to wonder shld i go study EVERY YEAR when the application opens...

Soon TYL will be officially become a POOR STUDENT (穷学生), so kind-hearted souls out there.... pls make ur donations to TYL Funding Organisations... any amt oso can.. it is the tots tt count.. wahaha...

Gd bye KTVs, Gd bye Cabs, Gd bye nice food, Gd Bye late night movies, Gd Bye Chilling, Gd by shopping, Gd by overseas trip

Hello Reports, Hello Assignments, Hello exams, Hello no life.... :)

Today 6th April 2010, Ae is in SG, i took off to go meet up with him and we went Universal Studio SG @ Sentosa!

For someone whom NEVER been to any of these kinds of theme parks anywhere (Disney Land/Universal Studio/ Waner Bros etc) except for Genting Theme Park, Escape Theme Park. THIS IS COOL!!! it is a cool place, with wonderful rides and of coz beautiful place!

if not for Ae, i dun think i would have the motivation to go. The tix are so damn ex... but after going today, i DIDNT regret, and i find it WORTH!!!!

ok....1st thing 1st...

Today is a weekday, so the ticket is $66 per pax. However, due to the soft opening, DBS card has promo with them, so a discount of $6 per pax, which made our tickets $60 each. then, they gave us each a $10 cash voucher for food and $5 cash voucher for souvenirs. No minimum purchase needed. use as cash. so we no need to pay for anything when we r in there. ALL rides are inclusive

Frm Madagascar, to Far Far Away Land to Jurassic Park and Lost World to The Mummy in Ancient Eygpt to Sci-Fi City to New York City to Hollywood... It is filled with surprises... ok.. it is a pity that some rides are still not open yet, esp Battlestar Galactica™, but still is good...

The ride in Ancient Eygpt was surprisingly and amazingly good... tt we went for it twice... then oso the 4D movie, is cool.. plus the weather was ULTRA sunny today (TYX and I got a sunburn on our nose.. wahaha.), so didnt miss out much except for those tt r still closed...

i shall not spoil all the fun.... go and experience it urself!!!!

i dun understand y SP made us go ALL the way down juz to take the admission card? At 1st i tot there was a series of process to go thru, tt's y when they told me my enrolment day was on 27th Mar, 0915, i 认命.. i cant avoid it.. i have towake up early.

but due to some circumstances, i was only back home at 4am on sat morning. hahaha... ok, i'm NOT blaming anyone.... this is really NOT intentional... things juz happen... wahahaha... it sounds wrong.. time flies when u enjoyed the company... nvm.. anyway back to reaching home at 4am, i only got to sleep at 5am. i woke up at 8am, and went out fast, hoping to reach at 9.15am.

I was slightly late, i went into the enrolment center, saw a familar guy. I knew is him... but then... i went ahead with my enrolment without calling out. i went over to hand in my letter of offer, then went to a counter, where the person asked me to filled up a survey form and she gave me my admission card and told me that, that's the end of the enrolment, i can check my time table one week before the term starts. i blur... tt's the end? and they made me all the way down juz to get tt card??? y cant they juz sent to me?? aiyo... i was suppose to meet yan and lh @ 12noon, but i was already free by 9.30am!!!!!

i went out... walked ard wondering where shld i go to rot my time away till it is time to meet them. (they were either slping or finishing some work, so cant come out early). i walked back to the station, once again i saw the familar figure walking otwards the car park... he got into a car and drove off...

suddenly, i was wondering... hw long we have not contacted each other? he got his driving licence during this period? he told me he didnt wanna learn driving. he say motorcycle was more practical... wooooo... things changed... well... it doesnt concern me anyway... hahahaha

anyway, i rot my time away in LJS in clementi. when it was almost time, i realised tt there was no longer any shuttle bus to ikea frm clementi, so we changed then meetin place to Queenstown.

we 3 girls, went to ikea then anchor pt then queensway shopping center even though ALL of us didnt get much sleep the previous night. but we ddint stay out too night.. so by evening, we went back home le.. and guess wat... our uncle called me at 9pm, asking if we r still otuside.... uncle said he is an owl, out only at night... but the truth is... uncle dun wanna go otu with us in the day!!! :p

Tt's my dreamy Sat... time to slp... WEEKENDS FLY!!

A walk down the the familiar road, then i realised tt hw much memories were being throw at the back of my head... they were buried in the far end of my brain by myself....
if i didnt walk down tt familiar road... i guess i wun even remember the memories existed...

Sometimes i wonder.. hw do we determine 'letting go'?

Scenario 1
Girl A talked about the happy days she had with Boy A to anyone who asked.
She would smile and said, "Those were the days..."
And when Girl A met Boy A, they can chat happily like old times, and truly care for each other. Boy A would still tell Girl A everything (juz like last time), abt his newborn, his family, his surroundings. Girl A will also tell him everything from her work, her complaint, her whining...

There is no awkward situation or anything... juz pure frenship between these 2 who were once more than just frens....
Girl A would think of Boy A frm time to time. At the same time Boy A would also wonder hw Girl A is doing if they didnt contact for awhile. Both were very happy if there is a chance for them to meet up.
Girl A and Boy A both keep the things tt remind them of each other with them , so they can see it from time to time.

Scenario 2
Girl B didnt talk much about Boy B. She sometimes 4got that there is a Boy B in her life.
Yet, whenever she was at a place where they were once been there..... she would be in dazed.
Everything that had happened in the past, appeared before her like a movie.
Boy B did not contact Girl B, neither Girl B contacted Boy B.

When they happened to meet on the road or thru common frens, there was an awkward situation. They dunno hw and wat to tok about. mayb they would juz smile or simply walked past each other.

Girl B saw photos of Boy B with his current gf. Girl B will go into daze once again. Thinking about hw he sweet he was, now he is no longer there for her... but for another girl.

However, Girl B would never think of him, if she didnt pass thru the familiar places, or hear his name or see his photo.. She would hide everything tt is somehow related to Boy B.
Boy B tried to stop all contact and tried nt to go places that Girl B frequently goes.

So have girl A let go of her past r/s? Let go of Boy A and vice versa? or Is it Girl B who have let go? Boy B also let go already?

刚看完Channel U 的魔幻视界，突然觉得跟现在自己就好像戏里的魔术师。。。

戏里的宣传部Ming对魔术学徒小鬼说∶

“观众爱看垃圾，我们就做垃圾。。。观众爱看色情，我们就做色情。。。我们就是要把观众拉回来。”

戏里的名宣传部经理Irene对魔术师James说:

“收视率就是成绩，收视率就是一切。。不管节目素质好不好，只要有收视率就是好节目。”

我老板今天早上跟我说:

“顾客爱喝屎，你就做屎。你做的产品再完美，顾客不喜欢，就算失败。你做的一样你认为是烂的东西，顾客喜欢，就是成功”

“销售成绩就是一切。不管味道对你来说好不好，会卖的，就是好产品，不会卖的就是失败的产品。”

James 和小鬼都好无奈，他们对魔术的热诚却为了收视率，要一而再的妥协。就如我现在的处境。为了销售成绩，我得让步。不爱人造味精、人造色素、人造糖精却一而再，再而三的放入我调的产品。
成本高，要减，所以加如糖精/味精。市场上最好卖的产品-有放入味精，我们就得加。。因为这是顾客要的口味。

小鬼说一句话:
“到底有没有人真正了解魔术、真正欣赏魔术？”
我问:
“到底有没有人真的会品尝食品？懂不懂什么是天然味道？”

想想看，好像只有我们这科系的人才讨厌味精、糖精的味道。市场上，大部分的人都爱吃人造味道。

什么推陈出新？什么创意？什么创新？这简直就是废话！销售额就是成绩单，就是断定产品的好坏的唯一标准。因为，在我们这社会里，没有人能接受新颖的事物。认命吧！我还真怀疑自己到底适不适合在这行混。

最近有小人在老板面前说东说西。还我得每天听老板说教。 说什么我们没改进、没进步。 问我有没有回家检讨、反省。问我有没有问过为什么产品会失败？我倒想问他们（包括那位小人），他们有没有回家检讨、有没有反省？为什么一定是我的错？孩子生出来不受欢迎，难道我不难过吗？为什么什么东西都说是我们？
每天就好象打仗。 好累，所以懒得管、懒得看、懒得说、懒得解释。我不好就不好，我没能力就没能力。

Yesterday was the birthday of our BELOVED BLUR BERNYCE! Lim Wen Ying!! hahaha...
Only the 3 of us went out, the others were not free. So me, Harris and LWY went out for lunch and coffee and rotting... LOVES rotting time with ROTTERS.

Anyway, those who noe wy, shld noe she always does sth perculiar/abnormal/weird/amazing/amusing..... well, on her birthday, she didnt disappoint us...
We went to Coffee Club for coffee/desserts/cakes... i'd asked the waitress to put a candle on a slice of cake. So when the cake was serve, i asked harris (who happened to sit opp her) to take a photo of her and the cake. and dunno wat happen, she laughed/breathe too hard... and the candle flame was being blew off by her actions. WE 3 stunned! We didnt sing birthday song, she didnt make a wish, the candle was out le... we looked at one and other then burst out of laughter....

since we have no lighter and we dun wanna to ask the waiter to light it for us AGAIN. we decided to do things the reversed way. Since candle was blown, then she would make a wish, then we sun birthday song.... cool rite? WY, always make sure her life is different frm other ppl... more exciting, funnier.. wahahhaah.... tt's the reason y everyone loves her rite? wahahaha :p

It has been sometime since i last updated!!! wah... my blog nearly went into coma.. wahahaha..
nw i'm in the crossroads on my life AGAIN! haiz.. i hate myself for not able to make decisions.
i applied for Adv Dip, by right i shld get my confirmation and enrolment package nw... but till nw i didnt get it...
on the other hand.. i got the application form for Massey Uni... i think my lecturers die die wanna me go study for 2 yrs FULL TIME. they seems like refuse to let me study Adv Dip PART TIME! it makes me feel like they purposely dun send out the confirmation letter and enrolment for me! y???

nw wat???
Massey Uni Degree with honours (+/- SGD 14k for 2 years)
2 years FULL time, back to the no life student... no income.. lectures everyday, rush reports, study for exam... wat if i got rejected again!?!?! then i cant study adv dip... oso no degree....
but then i will get a degree with honours, no office politics, no more arguments with bosses...

Adv Dip (+/- SGD 2k or 4k? i 4got... for 2 years)
2 years PART time, study after work, tiring, stressful.... coz still have to study and rush reports
but then i got constant source of income and i still have a life..

aiyo... hw?? ppl already pursuing their own career liao... i'm still troubled to study or not!! OMG!!! haiz haiz haiz,,, how how??? eeeeekkkkk..

Yes Ivan.. i noe u beat me in blogging abt Lyn's Baby... i let u de.. coz i was tooo tired.. hahahaha... if i really wanna beat u.. u think u would win me!?! wahahahaha

Anyway, yes... our dearest mommy, lyn gave birth to her 2nd girl on 6th feb 2010!!!! and on the 2nd day, ivan and i (the baby lovers) went to find her and baby
baby was sound asleep... coz BOTH Ivan and I are cushions to the baby.. so when we carried her.. she was sleeping so soundly... (hahah.. ivan, i die die oso wanna drag u into becoming 'cushions')
Look at her... soooooo sweet in uncle ivan's arms...


Well, mommy lyn haven tot of a name... so i decided to help her.. mommy lyn... i think hor... baby chinese name shld call 莘琳、莘玲(like cyndi wang xinlin?? (i noe the chinese character different lah... hahaha) 莘蕙？莘芯？莘怡？莘婷？莘芹？hahaha.. ok..i'm free... n i noe u r oso free in slowly thinking of a nice name for baby...

English name - Sherlyn (a combination of sis and mommy... ivan's idea.. i juz put it out.. :p)
Sherrie, Sherry, Shermaine, Sherice, Sherley...
hahah.. ok.. time for me to sleep... Mommy lyn... enjoy thinking for baby name.. :p

What happen if u done a thousand of nice/good/ right things? Nothing happen. What happen if u done one bad/wrong thing? EVERYONE BLAMES U! This is life... in a soccer season, u were the top scorer... ppl will remember u the most 2 seasons.... but if u've got an own goal.... ppl will remember u 4eva.... This is juz being a normal human...

Ppl will appreciate u... will be grateful to u.. but the appreciation and gratefulness lasted a short while... sooon they will 4get... this is how everyone behaves, u and i and everyone... cant deny..
BUT if u done sth nt right or hurtful, ppl will remember everything... it will last for a long time... may nt be 4eva.. but definitely last longer when u appreciate what someone have done.

i'm wondering... y shld i be nice when end up wat did i get nth... bosses blame u when things went wrong (n sometimes u are wondering wat u did), bosses blame u for nt doing ur job properly (n u really wonder WHAT IS UR JOB?) bosses are like tt, frens sometimes family oso like tt... i'm tired... and i feel like heck caring everything.. juz do wat i need to do... nth more... no pt go all out...

This time round... i felt the drag.... i no longer have the excitment to go over to BKK! NOT coz i've been there too many times... juz coz of a lot of things tt added up... i dunno y it become like tt... is it ALL MY FAULT!? ya.. i'm all to blame! this one blame me for dragging time... delay in booking of everything... tt one blame me for being too sensitive... other blame me for saying sth tt offended other ppl... blame me for being sacarstic... juz put ALL the blame on me ba.. i'm NOT entitled to be angry... i CANT show ppl i'm unhappy or sad or hurt.... i can only SMILE and say... hey, i'm OK... nth serious... sometime, i wonder... does ppl ard me treat me as a human being anot!?!? well.. suan liao.. as usual... i'm smiling... i'm ok....

good thing i still have things to look fwd to.... i get to see my thai frens!!! and i can buy accessories... (ya... i have a lot liao.... but it is never enough)

I DUN wanna organised this trip.. but i dunno y ended up.. i become organiser... i HATE being the organiser(for anything and everything)... coz
1st u cant get ppl to give u the truthful, constructive and timely ans or
2nd things go well and smoothly... no one will remember u r the one organising BUT if things gone wrong... ppl start blaming u
3rd NO ONE WILL APPRECIATE watever u do!!!!

SIANZ!

nw i need to stay positive... and continue smiling!

Oh ya... the environment in office nw is damn dangerous... i no longer noe who is friend and who is foe... who is the one is treating u sincerely and who is the one waiting for a chance to stab u... i'm very very tired of the 明争暗斗... and keep draining my brain to think of counter attacks when i sense tt there is an attack somewhere... I'm losing myself.....

罗志祥又创造了另一奇迹！！

Yes, SHOW LUO had his new album out already! 罗生门 is the album title. 12 tracks..
www.haoting.com has the album intro

专辑介绍
世界用7天创造 舞王用7年打造 罗志祥SHOW巅峰造极第7张音乐力作 [罗生门]

打开爱情的 罗生门 解开真实与谎言的密码
打开音乐的 罗生门 再创亚洲舞王全新神话
潮男领SHOW自我突破 2010装饰系潮男主场秀

台湾人的创意 好莱坞的班底 [爱的主场秀]MV开创亚洲舞王新神话
700万钜资远征纽约歌剧院
罗志祥化身剧场守护者大秀墨镜舞

第一道爱的罗生门 = 冲动

爱的主场秀 爱情刚开始的相遇 棋逢敌手 斗智斗勇 谁才是这场游戏的主导者? 结合BIG BEAT的电子流行摇滚曲风 墨镜舞王光芒四射 为什么要在一起 当感情过了冲动期 有时候会让人忘了当初心动的原因…
首度诠释爵士JAZZ灵魂乐曲风,展现成熟绅士魅力,让人惊艳

第二道爱的罗生门 = 伪装

习惯就好 回忆就像一道关不上的门 寂寞要花多久时间才能习惯? 阿沁(F.I.R) 继冠军点播曲[我不会唱歌]后,再次量身谱写SLOW ROCK抒情摇滚年度K 歌

第三道爱的罗生门 = 挥霍

爱疯头 当爱上一个人,为爱疯了头,赴汤蹈火,海派献出所有也不算什么! 首次尝试轻快的英伦摇滚节奏. 浪漫偶像剧[海派甜心]片头曲.

搞定 为了爱的证明 搞定所有要求 五体投地的挥霍 只为对方开心 带有80年代DISCO和HOUSE 节奏的轻松舞曲.

生理时钟 热恋时挥霍相爱的每一分钟 ,二个人像生理时钟24小时同步着 融合POP R&B 节奏的甜蜜小品

第四道爱的罗生门 = 等待

爱不单行 爱不是单数,相信自己能拥有幸福,对的人也在未来等待与你相遇 由马毓芬制作,金马奖最佳作词人严云农全新温暖情歌,浪漫偶像剧[海派甜心]插曲

第五道爱的罗生门 = 受伤

罗生门 是否真爱的学分 非要摔痛了才能修得成?那千奇百怪艰深的学问 就像罗生门 R&B节奏蓝调重拍节奏舞曲 畅销作词人陈镇川最新力作

第六道爱的罗生门 = 报复

危险的念头 当一段恋情结束,最危险的念头 是心存报复? 还是念念不忘? 情歌圣手姚若龙填词,罗志祥呐喊男人不为人知的心酸,成熟唱腔感人肺腑

第七道爱的罗生门 = 勇敢

老实讲 感情世界里 想爱就要及时说 当错过对的时间点 有些感觉就再也回不去了亚洲知名制作人李伟菘制作,郑淑妃填词.唱出爱情淡淡的哀愁与事过境迁的感慨

The whole album is superb!!!!! and he had gimme another K song!! 习惯就好-VERY VERY VERY VERY nice song.. good k song! hehe...

Bonus tracks WOW (feat. Elva) and IN YOUR EYES (feat. Rainie Yang) are also MUST LISTEN songs... GO listent to the album at www.haoting.com!!!

Yes, it is a brand new year! as Ivan said, i shld have a positive entry. hahaaha....
Well, hopefully this is it...

To kick start with the year, we went back to Malacca with Shwu Yann. Cheryl, Paul, me and Lihua had a different kind of experience in Malacca staying with Yan.
our very 1st experience is that the bus broke down when we juz entered the expressway.... this is the 1st time yan yan met this too.. hahaha... and the 1st time ever, we took 7.5 hrs to reach Malacca from SG.. cool rite??

Then we went on a makan spree... of coz not 4getting the Chendol and Assam Laska. Though i'm not really a fan of laska... taste wise is not tt bad...

We stayed over at Yan Yan's hse, which is so different frm wat we r staying in SG... but the place is HUGE and cosy.. hehe.. and is cooling at night and COLD in the morning even without fan/air con....

on the whole, it was enjoyable. muz yan yan muz be so tired lor.. coz have to run ard with us.. and drive... i dun think she got enough rest... THANKS GIRL!

next trip up.. my 2D1N batam getaway... to celebrate Jason bdae... and to go on spa and massage trip.. though the grp is getting smaller... we'll still enjoy it? yep.. i'm going on the 9th - 10th Jan... I'm actually quite broke sia... hmmm.. muz save up for my BKK trip liao...

Ok.. 1st day of work in 2010... i shld learn to see things at a +ve side.. and oso to be calm and witty whenever kana shoot. Wat is all these rite? TYL is a survivor!