Life in sch is getting chaotic... endless reports, then b4 u noe it... time for exam... sometime, i wonder... y m i rushing like mad? wat is the purpose? i didnt learn anything in this rush accept to meet datelines... oh yeah.. and think for a title for the report...

last week... i was rushing report till i didnt get enough slp.. i think the average slping time for the whole week is 3 hrs? haiz.. slp... my slp.... my bed....

i didnt noe i was stress... i tot i was only rushing out the report.. not stress... till one day, when i closed my eyes... i saw numbers... all the stuff i have calculated... all the facts and experimental errors... i cant slp peacefully.... then i noe.. I WAS STRESSED! sianz...

i realised being buried under piles of work and being stress didnt help in 4getting the past and ppl... in fact it made u miss the person more... at least for my case.... n I HATE IT! y muz my brain allow him to come into my mind?! i tot he is out of my mind for quite some time le?

yes... the more i stress.. the more i kana buried under the mountains of work.. the more i missed him... i missed his voice... giving the motivation to hang on, encouraging me to continue walking... i missed his encouraging and reassuring hug.. giving me strength.... i missed his failed attempts to made me laugh... and made me 4got watever was bothering me.... even juz his presence... oso could make me feel better... EEEKKKK.... y like tt?! i dun want it! i dun wanna be such a weakling!

i cant go find him... no way i gonna start running in circles again... no i cant call him.. coz i will want more than juz call. no, i cant do anything!!!! i juz cant do anything except to force him out of my mind! i hate him, i hate myself! i wanna ALT CTR DEL!