Today went to watch 'The Lake House' with wy and yp. It's a great movie, and very touching. This story originates from a South Korean Movie 'Il Mare'(meaning 'The Sea" in Italian) (???, siworae) starring Lee Jeong Jae, Jeon Ji-hyeon in yr 2000.

I watched the Korean version a few yrs back on TV. Not tt i noe of this show then.. i was juz too bored... was flipping channels then i came across this movie.. call it fate! haha... Story is tt the male lead and the female lead was communicating to each other thru mails. but they are in 2 different time. they are 2 years apart. the similar thing is that they satyed in the same house, using the same mailbox... the storyline are similar.. though some small little parts are ddiffernt.. cant exactly say where.. coz a few yrs back le.. but still.. my two fav shows!! hahaa....

the different between the korean and the warner bros flim is that korean show, the house is by the sea... and the english version, the hse is by the lake... both houses are beautiful, and the scenery.... left me speechless... how i wish.. i can have a hse like tt.. hahaa... oh ya.. the dogs r different oso.. wahahaa...

Keanu Reeves is HANDSOME... Lee Jeong-jae.. ok lor... Sandra Bullock is BEAUTIFUL... Jeon Ji-hyeon is also BEAUTIFUL... hahaa

Here are the pics from both the movies... say... which is better?? hahhaa


The Lake House


Il Mare


The house by the sea


The House by the Lake


The Lake house


The Sea

A new song by Van 范逸臣
His new album 不说出的温柔... got this song... Track 10.. if i'm not wrong... 算了
Nice.. i think.. lyrics oso cool.. hahaa....

作词:磐子
作曲:陈奂仁
编曲:invisible mem

天哭了 地湿了
我孤单了 人呢
该哭呢 该笑呢
还是该忘了 算了
算一算我也该醒了
不如撤一撤把心掏空吧
谁说的 谁说我该伤心呢
想一想你也该闪了
不如笑一笑通通忘掉它
算了吧 也不用等着你回答

不敢睡 不要醒
怕又痛了 夜里 都懂了
你走了怎么又乱了呢
乱了 算一算我也该醒了
不如撤一撤把心掏空吧
谁说的 分开就要心碎吗
想一想你也该闪了
不如笑一笑通通忘掉它 算了吧
就当我伤心的太傻

等到翻到简讯某一篇
才会发现 你早已经在那天
让爱情分裂

算一算我也该醒了
不如撤一撤把心掏空吧
谁说的 谁说我要伤心呢
分开就要心碎吗
想一想你也该闪了
不如笑一笑通通忘掉它 算了吧
是我伤心的太傻
也不用等着你回答

It's a long time since i last updated.. hahaa. coz no mood... coz work there stress building up, tuition there work le not happy.. haiz.. life... sianz rite?

1st the mktg manager resigned... meaning her job have to divide among us.. guess wat.. i have to do all the packaging design and stuff... recently export there got prob.. say tt we did not declare milk proteins in our pdt.. so may have to recall... n tt is a whole container of goods.. omg... haiz... then now have to change the design of the various packaging AGAIN!!! AVA did not give us a good time either.. due to some they deemed as 'misleading' claims.. meaning... i have to change the content of the packaging... our packaging got lotsa languages.. so change one meaning have to change for the other languages.. haiz... dutch, french, jap, korean, german.... omg!!! i spend the past few days looking at languages i dun even understand... trying to add the ingredients in... haiz... n pdtn there wanna the packaging to be ready FAST!! or else cant go on producing.. haiz...

then tuition there... my boss damn stingy... i combined one class with mine... coz the teacher was absent.. n they still considering whether to gimme the extra class pay anot.. kaoz.. tt 2 classes... not tt easy to teach lor.. they arent angels... though both classes add together is abt 10 over students... which is normal... but 1st... i'm teaching 2 different lvls... n 2nd.. my p3 kids r not excellent students...n need my 100% attention.... the p4... they arent any good either lor... coz got slightly slower students who need attention oso mah... i ran here n there.. n trying to make teach n settle the class... almost dead lor... n now they tell me might not get tt extra class de money!!!! wat the hell!? everytime last min call me, wanna me relief this class or tt class... or tell me do all the admin job.. collecting fees for my classes there.. wanna me promote the classes.. wat the hell.. haiz.. i'm considering to quit or not... but the supervisor.... very gd leh... haiz... she fighting with me to get tt extra pay!!!! SIANZ !!!!!!!

sianz rite.. so many things happened.. need someone to be with me.. listening to me whine... gimme a hug.. telling me everything will be fine.. i can make it de... but.. well.. kao zi ji ba... depending on ppl is NO USE!!
recently realise i dun have much frens.. online nobody to tok to... yihang n yt dunno y oso... everytime msn no reply, yp not online, jm too bz... cheryl got lotsa things to do oso... tok to cm... scare if i start whining..he buay tahan... start to quarrel again.. the last thing i want is to quarrel... i'm toooo tired.... then the china guys in my work place.. can make me laugh n allow me to 4get things TEMPORARY.... but still they are still not those who can trust entirely de mah.. (not tt i discriminate.. but... haha.. ).... then online recently got jx to crap... still... oso dunno how to say lah.. coz he is like a little boy to me mah.. lame each other.. crap each other nia...

m i becoming like xian?? getting deression?? becoming a loner?! i dun want!!!! argghhhhh...

我好笨！为什么他一次一次地说出空话，我还一次一次的相信他？今天，就好像一巴掌把我打醒：陈燕玲！你还在做什么梦？醒来面对现实！

他伤心、彷徨时，一通电话就能找到我。因为我会一直在的。我需要人陪，听我诉苦的时候怎样都找不到他。为什么要被伤了那么多次才发现自己在他的心里其实连一根草都不如？我只是一个能被利用的大傻瓜，一直在这里笨笨的守护着他。我也是人！我也需要有人依靠的时候！！

有人问我，他会来找你吗？我很肯定地说会，因为他会需要我的帮忙。他真的来找我，不过，并没有要我帮忙。他说他最近很忙，等他忙完了，我们出来吃顿饭。我等。一个星期过了，他没消息。我无所谓，只是失望。那天，我好需要一个人陪时，sms, msn, 都找不到他。我也无话可说。后来，他又来找我，先是为他的忙碌而向我道歉，然后说这星期一起出来吃饭。我等，再等。没有他的消息。我以为他忙到忘记了要meet 我的这一回事。所以，我又再次笨笨地 sms, msn 他，然后等。结果，他什么回应也没有，连一个简单的‘我很忙’都懒得跟我说。

他又再次的闹失踪，我又再次的空等。朋友需要做到这样吗？这算是朋友吗？没用的我，又再次因为他而掉下眼泪。这次我真的真的好绝望，我真的想当做从来都没认识过这个人。他又把我当朋友看待吗？我为什么要一次又一次地在他需要人的时候在他身边，给与他最大的鼓励？
或许，真的应该回到当初的陌生人吧。。。。。

It is 0300... n i still not sleepy... y? coz i slept the whole day... woke up at noon... rot n slack at home whole day.. slept again.. wake up.. then go sleep again... no one ask me out.. lazy to go out oso lah... then finally.. xian ask me out.. wahaha... rot at cwp at night lor..

anyway, recently... dunno y.. not in very gd mood.. y? i wish i noe... haiz... ok.. i noe... he is back... he came back into my life... create a whole mess... ok.. i noe is me.. problem lies in me... i shldnt let myself get involve.. i shldnt allow myself fall into the trap again... ppl warned me... yet... haiz... i'm used to not having him in my life.. y he appear again??? y m i so lousy??? get shaken so easily.... i tot i already kan kai le... but y? y when he is back to the ignoring mode... i felt so terrible??? damn!! i really hate myself!!

TH told me.. 重新得到，会再失去，那么宁可别重新得到。因为会再次尝试失去的痛苦. true lor... tt's y i'm afraid.. i'm afraid i fell back in again... then hurt all over again.. i was careful.. but still... 感情的事，真得不能用理智来处理。

曾经，你有一样东西，不过后来因为某种原因你失去了；你痛哭了好久。后来，你又莫名奇妙的找回，可是却也莫名其妙的再次失去；那种痛真得无法形容。最可悲的是这次一滴眼泪也掉不下来。会哭才不会那么痛苦，可是真的这次怎么也哭不出来。也许是知道根本一点也不值得、也许因为麻木了、也许忘了怎么哭了。

haiz... suan le... i can pick myself up last time.... this time i oso can de... i'm tyl.... i can de

I'm 23 yr old le!!! wahahaa....
Old liao... haiz... this yr bdae... ok lor.. quite low profile... wahaha... 1st... on the 9th jul, went out with my poly gang. Sing KTV with YP, LY and TH... (finally tt TH willing to pick up the mic and sing.. hahaa)... then we met up with YH, Zac, KG, WY... for a late lunch.. shop abit.. n go take photo card.. hahaa... photos will be up soon at my multiply page... go see ba... but then muz wait for YP to send me some more... wahaha...

then on the 10th.. went out for dinner with my family at this unknown restaurant... wahaha... trust my mom to find this type of lobang... got offer.. n got free cake for bdae celebration... wahaha.. well.. it's international buffet.. overall the food.. is Fair.. service is gd.. cake mah... fair lor... wahaha... the cake photo will be up in multiply oso lor.. wahaha...

Then on the 11th... ACTUAL DAY!!!.... haiz.. work as usual.. go tuition as usual... stunned when a lot of unexpected ppl sms me... wishing me... wahaha.. then tot this yr.. mybdae will be like tt pass quietly... who noes... when i reached home after tuition... i saw cheryl n yh at my hse... asked them how come at my hse... they tell me coz yh comp spoil.. come my hse use comp... ahaha.. when i go into my room... my whole bed is filled with Doraemon stuff lor!!! haha.. i scremed sia.. wahhahaa... cheryl the best lor.. wahhaaha.... coz sure is her idea de.. yh wun think of buying me doraemon de... hee (photos up in multiply... muz wait for cheryl send me photo 1st)... then by right i suppose to see JM once i stepped into the hse.. but well.. he late lor.. whahaha...

he reached at abt 11 sth.. wahahaa... after i cut the cake... btw yh made tiramisu sia.. NICE NICE!! wahahaa... anyway, i nearly gonna stop toking to JM if he 4got my bdae... hahaha.. but as i said... he reached at 11 sth... wahaha.... with champange chocolate for me!!!! hee....
Love my frens... best sia... muz thank JM, YH, Cheryl, my sis (for ganging up with them)... whahaa...
Thank yp n Ly for tt card... thanx CC for the tortoise... n my bro n marie for the shades, watch n doraemon hp chain.. hee... thanx daddy n mommy for the dinner.. n pei he my frens n yx on tues... wahahaa... though low profile... i'm still happy.. :P

5th July 2006 - My Graduation... Had to wake up early in the morning, go SP in formal attire. to recieved Dip... finally! Graduate le... seems so long.. yet so fast.. haha.. 3 yrs... as i say.. things happen... sad, happy, sweet, exciting, angry, nervous, funny... u name it.... i think i had the most interesting life in poly sia.. haha

as usual.. ceremony muz start off with ppl coming in n sit down...'with a little drama - i slipped n fall when walking down the stairs... to find my mommy... MALU!!!! wahaha.. and guess wat... my heels broke.. wahaha... n so nice... 2 broke at the same time.. so i no need worry 1 high 1 flat.. wahaha.. coz both become FLAT! ahaha'

back to the ceremony... then we waited for the guest of honour (some ppl frm dunno where.. but i sure nt frm spore)to come in.. everyone stood up.. sing national anthem.. then sit down.. allow the guest of honour to give speech... which almost 99.9% of it i didnt listen.. 1stly.. his ang mo too powderful for me to understand.. next. was smsing yp who was sitting at the other corner of the convention center... wahaha.. and oso smsing TH.. who was sittiing beside me... with one stranger in between us.. wahaha... so how to listen?! wahaha

then finally.. start to give out dipolma le.. see one by one go up take... wah.. really scare i go up on stand malu myself again by falling down. whaha.. but lucky no have.. wahaha... phew..

then finally got dip le.. ceremony ended with a graduate giving a speech.. which i didnt hear 99.9% of it.. coz i was bz toking to zac.. who changed his seat to beside me... wahaha..

we went out of the convention center.. my cute mommy n sis.. rush off to get the reception stuff... (their main motive to attend this ceremony is due to FOOD!!!!)... anyway, cant find them anywhere.. (ok. i too lazy to find them.. coz i noe where will they be... ) we these few crazy ppl started to take photo lor.. Y-gangz... W.X.Y3,Z... with lecturers.. wahaha... with my lao da.. blah blah blah... (photos will be up when yp sent me... she nt send me yet)

after tt .. went to JP had fish n co with yh, wy, yp... gossip... tok... rot.. wah.. long time never like tt le wo.. whaha... then at night went to highlight my hair.. wahaha.. my salon is call YP.. but nt my yeepei lah,... i 4got wat it call le.. hehe... nw i look like ah lian(quoted frm TYX!!!)

July.... It marks the 1st anniversary of this blog.. one yr le.. it had accompany thru my ups and downs.. July... oso my graduation mth... July.. is the most enjoyable mth every yr.. hope this yr oso the same... hahaa...

Today, had a long tok with mommy, yw and yx... they told me they find me wierd wierd... they say i changed... i become very moody, very short tempered... mood swings... i tot i always like tt de??? i blur... they say sth is bothering me... and i didnt say out.. but wat? i oso dunno.. coz i think nth is bothering me leh..

yw tell me.. i can bluff every1 in the whole world but cant bluff ownself... but i really dunno wat is bothering me... the he say mayb is sth i deemed as nt impt... so put it at the back of my mind.. but subconciously it already affected my emotion??? wah.. then this i really dunno le...

mommy told me... wat's bothering me shld be so r/s prob and not frm my work... i more puzzle.. how come i got r/s prob.. n i dunno.. then they say i have to go find out myself wat is the prob.. n solve it.. she say i keep alot of things to myself.. i bottled everything up... then one day i sure outburst.. then really jia lat le...

haiz.. i tok so much... yet they say i bottled eveything up.. mommy say.. coz wat i say de... nt really frm my bottom of my heart de ... i say out de r nt impt de lor.. hmm... izzit?? i oso dunno... whole day i've been asking... wat's bothering me?? coz i so short temper.. yx say is my frens.. coz in sch i too dependent on my frens emotionally.. so nw at work le.. i dunno where to depend on.. coz all bz with their own life.. haiz.. si mah?? i oso dunno... dun think so leh.. haiz..

dunno dunno. dun wana think le... suan le...

Finally!! i gotta watch World Cup le.. without cable TV... wahahaa... Thanx to LCM wo.. wahaha.. i gotta watch Brazil le!!! hee...

Anyway, very tired lor... not enough sleep.. partly due to world cup.. hee... however i started to wonder... shld i cont'd my classes mah.. very tiring.. n class is not cooperating... n not improving.. quite demoralising lor... sianz... i started to wonder.. if i cant teach well or they juz dun get it.. haiz... but if i no teach.. sure not enough $$ de lor... how???

i suddenly wish tt there is someone beside me.. for me to lean on.. for me to rest.. for me to whine... however.. suan le.. depend on myself better... wahaha..

actually.. tt CC very gd to me... he is caring and nice... even every night sms me.. chase me to go sleep... dun mind listening me whining... (but then again.. the pdtn workers here.. like fei min oso listen to me whine de leh... wahaha) for one moment.. i really almost fall into the trap lor... but NO WAY sia... wahahaa... say i nationalism.. wahaha got this word?? i oso dunno... wahaha... anyway, i juz cant accept lor.. nor my family will.. nor my frens will... hahaa.. different culture.. different beliefs.. different thinking... wahahaa...

Yx saw feimin tt day... n she say he dun have the 'china' look.. wahaha.. n indeed looks like Toro.. n she was so excited abt it lor... OMG!! hahaha... she say born in early Oct de.. all so cute de... like her... *faint*

Nw really sian.. so not working... haha typing blog.. coz boss haven come in... hee... well.. but time to start work le.. or else i cant finish then jia lat le... so many projects waiting for me.. (-_-!)

Last night, went to SP auditorium for Simon's acapella concert.. once a yr event.. wahaha.. i will never wanna miss de concert... wahaha...

We are from Simon fan club de.. wahaha.. n my sis say she is the president.. wahaha... we bought a bouquet of flowers... (ok.. sunflower to be exact) for him.. wahaha... cool rite?? i love tt bouquet lor... for one moment i dun wish to give it to him sia.. wahaha... i told yp i shall keep it as my own.. wahaha....

saw a cool guy in his grp... he looks like those bad bad guy... as i say.. i'm attracted to bad guy de mah.. wahaha.. he is cool lor... :p

anyway, simon last time sing jeff chang's songs very nice de... though his chinese not gd.. always get the lyrics worng.. wahaha.. but still... anyway, i ask him muz arrange jeff's song... 过火 ... his style... wahaha...

i shall wait!!! hee...

This is my fav song now.. lyrics are meaningful... to me... enjoy ba...

感情线 - 183俱乐部
爱情魔法师电视原声带

我想我已开始有点疑惑 好像被他说中些什么
难道已经没有别的选择 只能乖乖的束手就策
难过的是我们做了选择 是对是错谁也没把握
如果要我放手才能获得 为何在我心中有舍不得

看着你要走还装著笑容 掩饰的脆弱要撑多久
如果现在开口如何挽留 感情这条线注定只能这么远

不敢相信已经来到终点 想你爱他必定多一些
我们之间不可能再回到从前 我还傻傻画着幸福线

看着你走远还继续装笑脸 掩饰折磨我能撑多久
如果现在开口怎么挽留 感情这条线注定无法延长一点

你已不在而我何时才清醒 相信一切都是命
不曾放弃你我不会说什么 默默的承受像个男子汉

看着你要走[看着看着你要走] 还装着笑容[多么多么笑容]
掩饰的脆弱要撑多久[还要撑多久] 如果现在开口[现在开口]
如何挽留[如何挽留] 感情这条线注定只能这么远
看着你要走[woo～]还装着笑容[we will carry on]
掩饰的脆弱要撑多久[knowing there were words i've never said baby]
如果现在开口[现在开口] 如何挽留[如何挽留]
感情这条线注定只能这么远[let the words remain unsaid]

Back from Genting.. 3 days get away.. quite relax lor... rest abit... haha... sleep alot... suddenly.. really old le lah.. cant tahan too late.. bu ren lao oso cannot ar.. hahaa... too tired... i was sleeping alone in the room everynight.. coz mommy n daddy in casino till 2 - 3 am..

didnt went into casino.. only one time when i went in look for my aunt... dun like it there.. coz very smoky.. i dun like smoke mah.. somemore not interested in gambling lor.. though can watch live soccer frm there.. but i rather go back hotel room watch lor... but still managed to watch only one match.. coz alone at hotel watch soccer... no fun lor... end up i slept.. wahahaa....

went outdoor theme park.. went crazy whole day with yw, yx, alicia, wq, hj and james... i was the oldest.. whahaha.. expected mah.. anyway, we sat in all the exciting rides.. and screamed like nobody's business... wahahaha.... though the 3 guys were really PS when we screamed.. wahahaa...

Wanna played Go Kart!.. guess wat! I WASNT ALLOWED TO PLAY... coz i didnt reach the hight limit!!! kaoz.. their limit is 1.53m.. and I'M 1.53m and my sis is 1.53m!!! and she was allowed to play.. i wasnt allow!!! kaoz.. my bro go tell the person.. 'she can drive real car cant drive fake car ar' still no use.. haiz... SO SAD!!!! KAOZ!!!!

Love my nephews.. so cute.. haha.. i changed my mind in going genting was coz of them mah.. wahahaa..

anyway, this time round.. though did not feel lonely.. as with tyx they all never a dull moment.. however... miss my kakis lor.. go anywhere, or everywhere, i will imagine.. if my kakis here.. wat will we do.. how will we react.. where we will go.. well.. mayb next time my dreams will come thru.. right KAKIS!? hahaa... haha

did alot of thinking thruout the trip... coz got myself into quite a mess ba... didnt really noe wat was i thinking anyway... got too close with CC le. i think... i was all along treating him as a fren.. normal lor... like how i treat my other frens... but think signal went out wrongly.. *pray hard tt i'm wrong*... hope i wun landed in trouble..

Coz we passed our audit, so boss decided to treat the whole factory KFC.. we ordered le hor.. abt $180+ lor.. wahaha.. fei min they all say eat chicken nt full.. n say wanna burger.. so i purposely ordered 6 more burgers... 饱死他们!! wahahaa...

then asmine say she wanna treat the night shift de ppl. but dunno how. coz tt night she got sth on... so she cant stay back and wait for the delivery. so she wanna the night shift ppl go buy then claim frm her. but then till 1815 she still haven call them. then she was in a rush.... she say go ask chun chen buy lor... but when she called, he didnt pick up. so i suggest i'll help her find them lor. (hey, i did it out of helpfulness ok... no other meaning)

so she gave me his no. then went off.. i called him, he juz woke up.. so when i gave him instruction.. he damn blur lor.. i was on my way back home oso lor.. so ask him meet me under his blk.. i follow him go... (hey... dun think i did on purpose).. anyway, he asked me to call him when i finish work.. i told him i can go home le lor.. he stunned... wahaha... so when i reached my bus stop, i called him to come down...

when he came down.. i saw him smoking.. i very disappointed.. coz he is the only one i tot no smoke de!! haiz... anyway, he pulled me cross the road to the coffee shop.. n say treat me dinner.. i say dun want.. but he inisisted.. i say dun want.. i wanna go buy kfc then go back.. he still pulled me over and say muz be full 1st...

he inisisted tt if i really no wanna eat.. he oso dun wanna eat... then i of coz acc him lor.. coz he need to work overnight leh.. no eat how can.. so end up he treat me a cup of lemon tea and he ate his dinner... then we walked to central to buy kfc.. on the way.. we fight, bicker and chat.. haha...

then when reach central.. i saw a dog.. i stunned.. i pushed him to walked in front of me.. and pulled him in a way he was standing between me and the dog... who noes.. that dog.. walked towards me!!!! i nearly cry lor.. tmd.. cannot so 丢脸... haha.. i pulled him and walk damn fast.. he asked i scared of dogs ar.. i juz nod my head lor.. he told me he got a big big dog back at home in china.. haha..

anyway, thru' out the whole duration he did not smoke at all lor.. so i dun understand y start when he is nt a heavy smoker.. hee.. aiyah... nv understand guys lah... wahaha

yt say i did eveything on purpose lor.. 趁机. i swear... no no no.. wahaha... i innocent.. hee..

Finally!! Audit over le... scary sia.. tt day went to office extremely early juz to make sure everything in place lor.. thanx to all my pdtn workers.. they clear the whole place to so neat n tidy till asmine and i tot we went to the wrong place... it was so neat n tidy.. wahahaa....

at 1st tot got guy auditor.. then asmine wanna me go sha jiao sha jiao abit.. who noes 3 auditors all female!!! n somemore is those female in their late 20s early 30s de... jia lat liao... hahaa... coz sha jiao dun work on female esp at this age range.. wahaha...

they really inspect every corner of the factory... and DAMN FLY!! dunno when flew in de.. when they inspecting our pdtn.. they saw fly!!! kaoz... wahaha

but in the end... we only for 4 minor problems... mostly on documentation (except for tt fly lor).. haha.. well... can relax abit.. coz we can have our 3 certifications renewed and with a A grade.. wahahaa...

Asmine gonna treat the whole company ppl with KFC tml.. hahaa....

I'm stress, stress and more stress... sad sad and sadder.. haiz... audit changed to 6th jun.. coz pdtn cant be in place in time... then paper work alot.. then everyday work till 7 plus lor... tue n fri muz rush to tution... wao lao...
suddenly i felt like got someone smile n tell me ' Welcome to the adult working world' haiz..

to make matter worse... i 4got to bring my hp out.. i damn sian lor.. coz hp is half my life leh... 4got to bring... haiz... the worst of all... he long time no contact me... then suddenly today come tell me he like this girl.. ask me how... haiz

though i knew abt this thing quite long ago.. still dunno y.. when come straight frm him... i felt.. wierd wierd? terrible? dunno how to describe... funny thing is.. i still have to give him advice.. tell him wat to do.. still have to laugh... haha

funny rite... i tot i 4got le.. 4got his presence.. but when he come find me... i was happy.. bt when he tell me abt this.. i'm glad.. coz when he got prob.. he come find me... sad coz... nvm nvm... i juz sian... wanna whine nia.. i ok de... yp.. dun need worry.. tyl nt so easy bei da dao de.. wahaha

i still got china man.. haha

为什么人总要等到失去了才懂得珍惜？为什么要等到某人离开了才发现他是最重要的？人都是这样吧。都不会也不知道珍惜。

Juz read a novel... story is similar.. she left.. he then realised tt he liked her all the time.. he left.. she then realised he is the most impt person... normally when some1 realised tt... is already too late... this is wat happen in the story... she fall for another person.. he then realise he liked her.... too late le.... 常常叫人一定要珍惜身边所拥有的一切，但有几个人真地做得到呢?

got someone asked abt my past relationships... i told them is very complicated.. so complicated till i too lazy to think.. so too tiring... Officially.. i got 1 r/s... but strictly speaking i got 2.. so how to define??? i oso dunno...

i got an unofficial yet hard to 4get de r/s.... the sweet times, the happy times... till nw.. i can still remember clearly.. nw.. when both of us r like strangers... i treat it as i dunno this person... but i still can remember everything... like it juz happened yesterday... his smile, his warmth, his hands, his crap, his childish behavior... i no longer expect to see this person again in my life.. but the memories... is sunk deep in my head...

i got an offical yet painful r/s... this is a typical example of timing... i've waited for so long for a response frm him.. yet wat i got back was hurt n more hurt.. finally.. i tot i got wat i longed for.. he realised my presence.. finally.. but... it came late... i was no longer waiting... i didnt realise it till much later... we tried.... end up... i cant give him wat he want.. he cant give me wat i want... but i never regretted... coz at least we tried... then i noe he is nt the one.. nw... we r still frens.. i'll never give him up as a fren... he is a great fren...

well dun even noe y i wanna write this.. juz feel like writing liao.. i wanna sleep le.... ever since start working... really very tiring lor.. cant tahan till late nights.. esp nw.. everyday bz like hell... due to the audit... haiz.....

Now is lunch time at work.. haha.. nobody in office.. except for me, ayhua and kelvis... dun feel like doing work nw lor.. abit sian...

last night was toking to xh on the phone... we r both working.. in the same position... though her comp bigger, so she got subordinates... then yp oso.. she got a job.. n guess wat...she is doing the same thing as me n xh...

Anyway, after chatting..i realise how much i.. no.. is WE missed sch days... sch days.. nt happy... dun go sch... cant wake up.. then go late lor.. 10 am class start.. 1030 then walk in.. whaha...go sch got ppl crap... got ppl lame... everyday is a new experience... coz surly got one cute chap, be it zac, yh, wj or kg... or even yp or ly or wy or xh... sure give one stunning move that can make us laugh or cry the whole day lor

Really miss the times when we y gangz work on an experiment together.. me n yh fighting... debating wat is rite.. or yp n yh being kan jiong spiders... or we 3 laming one another or laming teachers... wahahaa...

then miss the whole grp of 9 ppl.. where zac, kg, wj always suan each other.. then kg always self-destruct... then yp, zac laming... then sometime ly or xh suddenly lame ppl..tt stunt eveyone... wahaha... then if sad or nt happy or stress.. sure very fast 4get de...
haiz.. nw we all at different places... no meet everyday... miss them soooooo much.. haiz....

ok.. ppl come back liao... i better start working... wahahaa

almost one week no update le... haha.. tt chun chen still in the night shift... haiz.. sianz... then nw the only person i go crap is feimin lor.. wahahaa...

tt yp.. say how come she here cant find any shuai ge... but when i went thru the files... both of them were already here when she tt time worked here lor... hmmm.. either she dun bother to look at the guys here (coz think tt they all cannot make it.. coz she dun like..... haha) or mayb they at night shift.. so never saw them... or mayb.. she dun find them shuai... wahaha...

anyway, I M SICK!!! sianz rite? haiz... sick on a public holiday... then never mind... till nw still nt ok!!! kaoz... coughing like hell... haiz.. (though still went singing on Sun.. wahaha) JM scolded me lor.. sick till like tt still go sing.. wahaha... but wei le ktv... si dou yuan yi.. wahaha... damn blocked nose... sleep oso cannot sleep properly.. then very tired lor.. sometime how i wish got someone beside me let me whine.. wahahaa...but... haiz... suan liao.. haha

started on the idol drama Ai Qing Mo Fa Shi by 183 club de... this show yp they all long time ago already started to be crazy over it le.. i was not free mah.. so nw then start.. sure enough.. I M ADDICTED!! nw i noe... i still in love with 183... i never 4get them lor... haven bian xin... wahaha... MING DAO, SHAO WEI!!! SHUAI DAI le...

I said got 2 China guys in pdtn.. one is that fei min.. (Toro look alike) and the other is chun chen (always at warehse de).. i think alot shld noe by nw esp zac... if i starting say tt guy shuai.. n start to go crazy abt him.. i wun be very gd with him de...

so this is the case here... i only say hi n smile.. occassionally, tok to him only... nt as close as compared to chun chen... hahha... chun chen is my kaki in warehse sia.. go down there sure fight with him.. or bicker... or he bully me... so i like to go down there if i bored.. haha.. see him climb up n down like a monkey.. wahahaa...

fei min is a yr younger than me... shld be more than a yr lor... then chun chen is same yr as me... but he is a jan baby.. another capricorn.. wahahaa....

but.. haiz.. he was being transferred to night shift.. sadz lor... downstairs no one crap with me le... then this morning... he was preparing to go home le.. coz overnite shift.. i was downstairs waiting for water to boil to make acup of espresso fpr tasting.. he told me he kana sacked... i go kicked him.. then he heard me sneeze non-stop.. tell me flu muz drink ginger tea.... i faint.... then he give me tt *hehehe*smile.. (he noe i hate ginger tea lor).. i go kick him again..then he serious face tell me he is serious... wanna me go drink ginger.. or else flu got worse then jia lat... i made a face to him..he come bish me... haiz..see lah.. kaki not downstairs liao...bored to death le...

Work starting now.. but abit lazy sia.. sianz.. tired..
juz nw got war.. management VS salesman... juz coz of a joke.. haha.. haiz...
got nth to do nw actually...

haiz... drag till lunch time then can finish typing...

juz nw went downstairs crap with the workers again.. then hor... they bully de lor.. humph.. esp chun chen.. a guy who is same age as me lor... see me always knock my head... though i always go kick him lah.. wahahaa...
mommy say if i like tt crazy.. they sure nt respect me.. so wun listen to me... but i think otherwise *hopefully*.. hee...

tt day rot in cwp with wy n yp... hahaa... lame one another till dunno like wat... haha... like the feeling...girls.. next time come out more often hor.. to release all the lames tt accumulate in us at work... wahaha... at work hor.. no one appreciate the lame jokes de... hee..

feel like sleeping le... haiz.. nt eating lunch.. coz too lazy to eat... can imagine tt?! haiz.. guess wat they having today? KFC!!!! i still can say no...this is how lazy i'm.. wahaha...
sian liao...my whole office shake sia..like earthquake... coz downstairs roadworks i think...haha

This is the 100th entry ever since i changed to blogspot.. wahahaa...time flies wo... hee

today went to Expo in the afternoon with my lady boss, accounts and local sales manager. we had a booth in the Food Hotel Asia.. Boss and overseas sales manager already there le...

Food Hotel Asia is a big event in food and hotel industry.. this is an exhibition whereby all related companies including fd companies, instruments and equipments, machinery, even locks, pillows and beds, locks, safebox for hotels come together n show to the related industry wat they have... ppl frm food n hotel industry from world wide will come down n take a look...

if didnt register for an entry pass.. need to pay an admission tix of S$80 then can go in.. i heard le stun.. hahaa...

Cheryl started her internship at this sauces company call Sin Hua Dee... CHNG's KEE de sauce de..she is the mkting side de.. so of coz have to be there.. she had been sooooo bz... hahaa.. saw her at the fair today... she looked so professional... she is soooo.. dunno how to describe lor... juz feel tt she is so gd.. toking to potential customers in those biz like tone... make me admire her more lor.. love to see her in her formal.. coz she got those 女强人 de look... she is already pretty liao.. then plus the way she present herself.. n how she do things.. wao... even me oso can fall for her.. wahahaa...

then oso saw yixian... she is working in a cheese company... n helping Bakels (hope i got it right)... hahaa... as pretty as ever.. she is always capable... hahaa

see them made me feel tt i'm nt alone.. coz they oso working.. oso bz till siao... but juz dunno if they got kana scolded like me like tt anot? hahaa.. actually is nt scolding lah.. juz tt.. things were very chaotic in office.. then i had to run up n down frm pdtn... superior didnt give instructions properly... pdtn side nt tt free to entertain every little thing.. so me middle man.. kana frm superior... oso kana frm pdtn lor.. when pdtn supervisor shouted at me.. i nearly cried lor... coz nt my fault mah.. but can understand him oso lor.. he got so much to do.. yet upstairs nt organise.. pack liao then realise 4get this.. ask me go take.. then i went back up again.. she say 4get tt.. ask me go down take again... haiz.. the whole morning i juz run up n down can liao lor... ask her go take it herself.. she say i familar to pdtn.. get faster.. i new de mah.. a lot of things dunno put where.. then see pdtn so bz.. dun dare disturb... then cant find.. ran up n say cant find.. dunno put where.. then kana say.. hw come i dunno since i everyday at pdtn (kaoz.. i go check on the quality n hygiene de leh.. who cares they put wat at where.. haiz) bo bian then go ask pdtn supervisor.. then kana shouted.. haiz...

actually i dun blame pdtn supervisor.. coz he did wat he was told to do de.. is upstair tt one nt organise.. haiz.. when these things happen i'll go tok cock with the china men.. hahaa... similar age as me mah.. go tok cock abit.. 4get all the wei qu.. then go face the music again.. hahaa..

then lcm... haiz... i dunno him.. xian say we got lotsa misunderstandings... but wat can i do.. he no attitude.. i give attitude.. he attitude i more attitude lah.. haha... then nw he say he no longer care abt my things liao.. then say i no longer his fren. haiz... dunno wat to do oso lah..

I got a new mp3.. 512 MB for $90... so exciting rite??

Haiz, but yesterday... mp3 n hp decided to die together... n my water bottle aided in the suicide plan.. 1st.. water bottle broke... then water flow out... then it flooded my bag... n my mp3 n hp were in it...I WAS TRYING CLOTHES when the suicide plan happened.. haiz...

i was wondering how come got water dripped down in the fitting room.. when i looked closer... it was frm my bag.. i panicked!!! i quickly dived into my bag to save my hp n mp3 player... haiz.. they swallowed too much water in...

u tilted my hp side ways still can see water flowing thru the lcd screen.... n mins later.. my hp was in coma!!!!!! *sob**sob**sob*.... *whine**whine**whine*... mp3 initially got respond.. but oso slowly lose conciousness... the... beeeeeeep...beeep... went into coma oso...

last nite i brought my hp n mp3 back to TYX electronics doc.. doc siao ding dong aka dr tyx 1st operated on hp.. she said mp3 to young.. n somemore got warranty... so better dun ooperate 1st.. hp no more warranty liao.. can operate.. but prepared for funeral juz in case..

i was so sad.. y tt 2 wanna commit suicide?? y they so foolish.. everything can be resolved de mah... juz tok.. haiz...

then today.. i came back to TYX electronic doc... Dr Siao said hp might wake up anytime.. mp3, she is nt sure.. n guess wat.. my hp really woke up!! at the time 24 apr 2006 2300.. my hp woke up.. thought still got water injuries at the lcd screen there.. still.. it survived!!! hp dun bare to leave me.. haha.. i no need buy new hp le...

Dr Siao said.. mp3 still need to be under observations.. PRAY HARD.. dun let anything happen to mp3!!!

today rained damn heavily.. thunder storm... then when i reaced home.. i stunned.. my hse flooded sia... windows cant withstant the strong wind n heavy rain... water seep thru... enough to flood my whole room.. flood my bro's whole room n flood my living room.. omg!!!! lucky thing no tragic happen.. only piggy n doraemon were wet... but.. they were safe n sound.. as Dr Siao Ding Dong manage to save them in the nick of time....

Dr Siao Ding Dong.. only can do her best when she is siao.. she nt siao.. n say seriously wanna help u repair sth.. u better dun.. coz sure spoil.. when she siao.. n say wanna spoil ur stuff.. then by all means.. wahaha.. but better be tt sth tt has no more warranty better.. hahaa..

i going to acc my hp le... n go see my mp3.. i'm praying hard for my mp3 to wake up....

Juz for ur info.. my mp3 oso woke up.. at the strike of 12.. hahaa.. both of them come back to me le... hahaa.. SO HAPPY!!!!

Today 14th April 2006 marks the 10th yr of 5G1U!! hahaa... we meet up today.. but nt all present. lyn n ss werent here... tt made ivan sad lor.. coz 10th yr.. we still cant get the whole grp... but wat to do.. i mean they got their valid reasons... we cant help it de mah..

ivan, xin jie (she finally appear liao) and me went ktv.. then huizhu met us at the last half hr... sing liao went makan at sakae sushi... then went min ge chan ting.. hee.. nice place leh.. next time muz go again... but quite ex lor.. go everytime sure broke de...

the min ge chan ting is at Marina Square... call music dreamer (爱琴海).. nice place.. then today got Nick Shen (沈炜?) oso.. he is one of the singer... 1st time see him real person... haha.... nt bad wo... to think tt last time when he was in Star Search, i was his supporter all the way.. wahaha... anyway, we dian ge mah... then he ask who.. the we say us lor.. he ask wat does 5g1u means... anyway, at one pt he say 那堆朋友 blah blah blah...

he left after his session, he rushed off.. then suddenly got the pianist/guitarist of the 1st session came up to me telling me tt i got a call.. i stunned... how wld someone noe i'm here? n how come no call my hp.. call the place... at 1st i tot is a prank.. i tot ivan they all wanna play a prank on me lor... i went with him in suspicion.. then when i picked up the phone... it was Nick Shen...i more stunned... he said he wanna come n apologised juz nw after he came down.. for saying yi dui...but 4got abt it then rush off.. so call lor... i said nvm ar.. he asked us go again on the 27th.. coz he will be performing again.. hahaa... hmmm.. will go if free... :p

Today ivan n xin jie.. kept saying i no change at all.. say i muz change.. i muz improve, i muz go fwd... cannot always stagnant down there... hmmm.. actually quite chim leh.. i dun really understand wat they mean... izzit coz i too childish? or coz i like to fa hua chi too much?? anyway, i noe my frens.. esp my sec sch bunch.. cannot tahan me le.. even yt to a certain extend... wat aspect of me tt they dun like abt me... i nt very sure... mayb coz of my immature thinking?? or my fa hua chi episodes too many le??? coz i can only tink of these 2 tt ppl cannot tahan de..
i oso dunno wat to say... coz i already took up the responsibilities of wat an adult shld have de.. like earning n contributing to the family. i took up the role whereby i helped to share problems my parents facing.. i helped in guiding my nephews n nieces..

it's only at the relationship aspect i muz say.. i still very childish.. i still idolised... though i dun understand y ppl become adult cannot siao shuai ge... anyway, since this is norm.. then i think i consider i abnormal lor.. haha.. i hope to have sweet n romantic r/s which in real life.. u cant possibly have de.. i still tt diao er lang dang pattern.. dunno when then can settle down.. i always think of the impossible de.. n never be serious...

i dream.. always dream... i'm naive.. which even my sis oso worried abt me.. coz i go out sure very jia lat de.. mayb this is the part ppl dun like abt me ba.. dreamy, crazy, childish.. haha...

aiyah.. dunno lah... 23 liao.. nt young anymore.. how much time i muz waste then realised it's time to grow up? tt's wat they ask me.. n as i say... i dun understand which aspect u all asking.. izzit abt my future? if yes, i muz tell everyone.. i noe wat i wanna do.. i never be so clear b4.. currently this company is my stepping stone.. n after i gain enough experience.. i'll go n find a place where i can really advance... to cont'd study or not.. muz depend on my finacial status.. n if it is necessary mah..

if it's abt my r/s... i muz say.. at this pt of time i dun wanna think abt r/s... coz i dun see a need to.. though u all say frens wun be with u 4eva... u sure need someone de.. esp when i'm someone who is so yi lai ren de.. but this muz see fate de...though i admire ivan's courage... to fight for his happiness.. no matter how hard.. n he got it le.. hee... but for me.. shui yuan lah.. too many incidents to let me c the dark side of a r/s n how hurtful n destructive it can be.. hee...

mommy say is my behaviour.. hmm.. i must not jump up n down when toking.. muz behave like a lady blah blah... haiz.. so i say le.. coz u all didnt see me when i'm involve in serious stuff... (any events or at work) i'm wat u all consider as 'mature' de lor.. stand str.. tok like adult.. no jumping up n down.. i act everyday due to work.. last time was coz in sch i need to tok to the public during exhibitions n stuff n during mentoring events when those big shots ard.... so when i'm with my family, with my frens whom i consider closer de... i dun see the need to cont'd act somemore...

tell u ppl.. for me to become those demure gentle kind of lady.. is impossible lah.... bbut to tone down my loud nature... i try lor... as for my hua chi... if i tired le.. i'll stop eventually.. hahaa

this week Phan came to SG for 3 days. he came on mon, left on wed.. i dun even have the time to meet him lor... so end up on tues, after 10, went to meet him for supper with my parents.. hahaa.. so happy to see him...

he is not very tall... but think got 175 lah... hahaa.. he oso has a big built... his shoulders r broad.. he is one yr older than me... wahaha.. anyway, he got a gf... n tt gf is my thai fren too.. jo...

he is like one big bro beside me.. taking care of me.. bullying me... letting me his shoulders, giving me his warm hug.. haha.. but yh they all say is i bully him,.. nt the other way round... wahahaa..

tt day, when i sent him back to his hotel after supper... i felt abit sad lor.. coz he leaving le mah.. n i no time meet him le...he left giving me a hug... his hugs always so secure n warm... anyway, the next day when he was in airport, he called... n tell me tt he had already checked in.. asking me to take care of myself.. i was very touched.. really...

then ard 10 sth he called using his thai hp.. telling me he reach thai le.. again remind me take care of myself... haha... suddenly i feel so xin fu.. wahahaa... got a big kor kor like tt care for me... hee...

i realised tt i'm someone who needs a person beside me... giving me warmth n security... no matter who u r... as long as u let me feel comfortable, warm.. i no need to link to u romantically.. frens will do.... (like tt like very shui bian hor? hahaa) mommy dun like this part of me.. say if i cont'd behave this way... next time my bf sure buay tahan... coz i so close to ppl.... well.. tt's y i dun wanna a bf.. waahaha.. though when my precious guy frens... even girl frens... got partner le... all 4get abt me le.. :P but.. happy can liao. hehe

Intructions.
1. Do the survey/quiz.
2. Write down the names of 7 people who you want to sabotage.(not really sabo lah)
3. Tag their tagboard and tell them to read here for the rules of the game.
So here I go...

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Seven qualities that I want my potential boyfriend/girlfriend to have: Good Listener, Care for me, loving, gimme security, humor me when i sad, like to sing n cook

Seven things that scares me: Loneliness, my family n frens leave me, dogs, lizards, injections, darkness, ppl angry

Seven random songs at the moment: Ni zui zhen gui - Jacky Cheung & Gao Hui Jun, Superwoman - Cao Ge, Bei Feng Cui Guo de Xia Tian - Lin JJ & Jin Sha, Feng - Jay Chou, Kiss Goodbye - Lee Hom, Ben Lai - Tong En, Zhi Dui Ni Shuo - Lin JJ

Seven things I like the most: Apple Pie, Doreamon, 183 club, 5566, Pearl Milk Tea, Mos Milk Tea, Sing

Seven important things in my bedroom: Doreamon Bloster, Big Doreamon, Pillow, Bed, Hp Charger, Laptop, Big Big Piggy

Seven random facts about me: Crazy, Happy, Loud, Stupid, Love to sing, Read Chinese Novel, Cry Baby

Seven things I plan to do before I die: Meet 5566 n 183 club, Earn big bucks, to be loved, to love, to see my frens n family happy, to get a gd husband, and have cute kids

Seven things I say the most: kaoz, wao lao, tmd, go n die lah, haha, huh, diao

Seven people whom you also want them to do this: lazy leh, who interested.. juz copy n paste in ur blog lor...

I'm fine... TYL wun be unhappy for so long de.. mayb yesterday juz suddenly feel very sad.. coz no one chat with me.. somemore work damn bz n stress... then ppl wasnt in gd mood to tok to me.. of coz sound nt friendly lor... then i too sensitive... wahahaa.. very fast 4get de lah...

anyway, y i say work bz n stress.. coz my 2 bosses went Taiwan today with their son. Then b4 they go, they instruct me do lotsa things mah... 1stly, coz due to change of ruling in Europe, honey content in food cannot be more than 9%, we have to change lotsa ingredients. then have to send for lab test to do nutrition table... blah blah blah... then at pdtn side they say they nt enough outer bags to pack... need to order nw.. purchase dept come chase after me, then muz chase after the lab to send me fast, the mkting side wanna me check the design n nutrition tables of the outer bags.. b4 it can be sent for priniting... so big headache lor...

then on Mon, ppl will renovate the pantry to become my R&D lab... so i have to clear the place 1st lor.. then it's sooooo messy n so many things... then dunno to throw anot.. coz if boss come back cant find the thing he want... then i die.. but boss de wife wanna me throw.. chim rite? wahahaa..
then i need to send our tea samples to lab to test for artifical colouring... aiyo... so tt outer bag oso cannot be sent for printing.. but pdtn supervisor kept pressing us... so i made my own decision.. to go ahead with printing... no need wait for the report.. coz tt lab report is only to RECONFIRM... hahaa...

end of this mth got lotsa guests will be coming to look at our factory.. so i muz make sure tt the pdtn is in the best conditions... n oso muz help to find lab coats... for visitors de.. so they can go in our pdtn... i need to tok to the salesperson.. guess wat.. i almost everyday meet a sales person.. n i tok sensibly.. wahahaa.. 'yt, proud of me?? i finally can tok sensibly leh.. wahahaa... ' coz y lady boss say, i'm officer... so got authority.. some of the decision i made it myself.. (-_-!) so of coz muz tok sensibly lor...

i sometime wonder wat's my position.. hahaa.. i know as QC officer.. but then hor, i seems like bao dao wan.. haha.. purchase, shipping, pdtn, mkting, packaging, all muz 'add one leg' hahha... but nvm,... learn alot mah.. hee.. :P

i finally got tt toro look alike guy's name le... he is call fei min (飞敏）special hor?? wahahaa.. tt day i jia jia ask my colleague if she noe the 2nd floor pdt workers' names mah.. she asked me who.. i say all i noe the name except for him... i describe him as Toro look alike, then she told me is feimin or huimin.. she 4got.. then i today came across the pdtn workers name list... n saw it.. wahahaha...

i went up to get the tea raw sample.. it was urgent.. coz i need to get the test done mah... who noes.. tt feimin he tricked me lor... i asked him if got anymore left anot.. he went check le tell me no have... i jumped up.. n started whining lor.. coz no have means i need to get my pdtn supervisor to go warehse get.. n meaning it will be quite late lor... then i saw him mischivious smile... diao.. i stared at him.. he say got lah.. bluff u de.. i almost wanna go up punch him.. wahaha.. i jumped up again.. this time is coz i happy.. wahaha.. i got wat i want.. n happily went back..

then so qiao.. everytime i go down pdtn there, i always meet him de lor... either he coming out for water break or toilet break.. haha.. everytime he smile at me... nearly faint on the spot lor.. lucky my kakis nt there lor.. if nt, i sure fa hua chi on the spot de.. wahahaa..

ok lah.. enough of my hua chi liao.. wahaha...

Tml start, boss will be out of town.. wahahaa... 2 bosses out.. left one who dun normally stay in office.. hee.. but muz do lotsa things b4 they come back.. haiz,.. n muz prepare for guests to come at mth end..

anyway recently.. dunno wat happen... ppl gimme attitude... sian... wat did i do???? haiz.. i very sian... prob lies with me mah??? tell me lah.. aiyo.. y like tt de?? i thinking too much? haiz... sianz lor... nw everytime online.. very sian de lor.. aiyah dunno lah.. mayb sth wrong with me... i go fan xing.. suan liao......

End of March liao.. haha.. got my 1st pay at Gold Kili.. hee.. the feeling is different when i got my pay frm my tuition centre.. hee... coz its my 1st permenant job mah.. hee..

2 weeks here... quite like it lor.. ppl r nice.. somemore production there got shuai ge.. wahahaa.. though China man... hee... if wanna Singaporeans.. then all uncles lor.. hahaa...
here they like family lor.. taking care of ppl de. no wonder yp say they r nice ppl.. anyway, yp.. they still remember u lor..
hahah.. i was telling the pdtn supervisor, ah sheng abt u... he say.. oh.. tt skinny skinny de.. hahaa... candy oso remember u.. cindy too.. they all say u guai guai... haha... they haven see u lame.. wahahaa

salesman there.. got young de... n oso damn crappy.. n cute in certain actions.. but o have extremely shuai de lor.. wahahaa...

i still like to go pdtn there... at the mixer room... got one.. looks like Toro lor... but i never got his name.. sianz... this week.. on ave i go up there 2 times a day.. 'checking' on the quality n cleaniness.. wahaha... he is nt tall...i mean nt very tall.. the most 175 or below.. hahaa... but nvm.. shuai.. i can close one eye on height. hee

i realised tt these foregin workers... some of them are at my age.. or even younger.. i juz trained a new worker.. he is borned in 1987 de lor.. n downstairs got a skinny but strong guy.. somehow like zac like tt.. hahaa.. he is same age as me.. he mah.. oso nt bad looking.. but tt Toro better lah.. though this skinny guy.. he is tall... abt 180.. somewhere there.. hee... he always see me walking ard.. he always shout.. 'hey shopping ard again wo'. haha...

the aunties in the pdtn area all very nice... hee.. but hor prob is.. i dunno how to scold or say them when i saw them wearing accessories when they t suppose to.. haha.. boss say muz tell them u r boss... but i can do it when i with my poly kids.. with those elder than me.. how to do?! omg.. hahaha.. so i using respect approach... hope it works wo.. hee...

So many things happen.... n was so terrible, was so hurtful, was so disappointed.

all the while, she led me ( or shld i say US) the wong way.. making me (US) hate the wrong person. the whole thing turned out to be like this.. is coz of HERSELF! she herself is only to blame!

looking at the whole thing... we seems like a fool... we always tot she is the victim... WTF! she is the player! n we r juz some stupid figurines then she played with.. to think we were so hurt when she cried... we so angry with him... come to think of it... how stupid of me tt i cant see the whole thing...

she create so much drama, so much trouble.. cause the family to have sleepless nites... cause ppl who concern abt her to run ard... to try their best to help her.. giving up their personal time... end up... all r juz shows! a show she directed! she said sorry.. she made pormises... yet.. her sorry is worthless... coz she said it.. but dun mean it... her promises... r empty... she is worse than those guys i noe... at least those guys.. sometime fulfill their promises... she leh.. NOT EVEN ONE PROMISE SHE KEPT!

She made everyone utterly disappointed in her.. giving up on her.. once she was surrounded by ppl who truly concern abt her.. but she do stuns, she gave attitudes... create dramas... nw.. every1... even me! si xin le! no use wasting time on such a person... i chose to believe her, to trust her in watever she say in watever she do... n wat she did to my trust to her? she broke it! she lied even to me! she made promises to me... n broke it! even the person who most teng her... dun even bother to tok to her anymore!

i'm hurt by u... u broke the trust i had in u... i'm disappointed... u said sorry.. but u did it again... nw u said sorry again.. how much it worth? do u noe how worried ur family were? do u noe tt night u didnt go home, ur mom didnt sleep.. not even a wink... she was out whole night OUTSIDE LOOKING FOR U!! i didnt noe u r such a 无情无义、没有心、狠心的 idiot!

how old r u now? i mayb childish.. but i sure noe how to think... ur actions... r not an adult actions.. u r behaving like my 14- 15 yr old kids! no.. i shld say my 14 - 15 yr old kids r more mature... nw how to thin better than u! so dun ever say tt i'm childish! 因为你没资格！

u r a disappointment! please! go 反省反省吧！u've disgrace urself in the public n in front him... HE, someone u deem as impt! wat wld he think of u? wah... u love him so much.. he gan dong.. n be with u? U R WRONG! he think tt u r a disgrace.. a woman i shld say a girl... with no dignity, no pride, n shameless! someone who dun even spare a tot for others! u think he'll fall for u?! FAT CHANCE!

the person i noe.. who will always put others b4 self... who was sweet, nice, caring is gone... gone le.. wat left is someone i dunno... someone none of us noe...

i dunnno when she'll read this entry... but i still write lor, hopefully she'll come across this entry... n i noe the consequence of posting this entry.. coz she may nt be the 1st to read it.. it shld be another person who might read it 1st...

i muz apologise to my best fren.. i'm sorry i didnt tell u anything.. i dun wanna u be worried, yet cant di anything.. i dun wanna u feel as helpless as me.. many times i wanna tell u.. but i cld nt bring myself to.. coz dun wanna dampen ur happy mood... dun wanna u to think too much... sorry...

Today results out... finally... after working so hard for the papers... we got the results... overall... my results... erm... shld say... quite happy with it lor... but still sad tt my fd flavours i got C+. i noe fd flavours nt my cup of tea.. but i did put in considerable time in leh... suan liao lor.. haha

wat stunned me most is packaging... wao lao.. it was the last paper... n i really got no mood to study le.. in fact.. juz like tt read thru de... muz be lady luck beside me... hee.. yihang say dun wanna fren me le.. haha.. hang dun like tt lah.. let me once be proud of my results lah.. hahaa.. :p

at gold kili... worked for almost a week le... tml will be a week liao... haha... hmmm... finally got my own acct... so tml can d/l msn liao.. n personalise my desktop.. haha... nw thinking if i wanna bring my cushion go mah.. haha...

i wanna go get a big cup.. mug,, got doreamon and got cover de.. hmmm.. got mah?? i dunno.. muz go find.. hee... or mayb ask ppl find liao buy for me.. wahahhaa... :p

ppl there all r quite nice... guess wat.. i need to go down production line there... check all the production workers to make sure that they follow rules n regulations when working in the production area.. coz fd mah.. of coz muz be hygeinic.. then oso muz ask ppl query regarding the nutrition part.. n oso muz write complaint letter... esp when it is due to the quality.. n the thing i hate most is to read all the ISO, HACCP and BRC stuff... haiz.. but i have to.. coz i QC.. so when audits come.. 1st shoot is me.. haha... wao lao...

my boss... aka known as DESMOND NG haven come back yet.. if he come back.. i think i got more things to do sia... haha... coz muz involve in the R&D oso.. haha... nw my lady boss... renovating the pantry... n oso a room downstairs... to make into 2 labs for me.. so i gotta source for the equipment n stuff in the lab... haha... this is the part i like.. haha

well go play game liao.. heee... btw.. i've change my blog song to 同恩 - 本来. like it alot.. coz nice ar.. lyrics meaningful... haha....

同恩 - 本来
词:阿怪 曲:林松锦

下雨了站在玻璃门里头 并没有总是挂念着我
你带着雨伞来接我 夜晚了只剩老板跟我
像从前你抽着烟皱眉头 不知怎么安抚太任性的我
本来不觉得你特别疼我 直到你不再疼爱我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣 不会再庇护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我 直到你不再疼我以后
来不及了 手写的留言对象已经不会是我

停雨了不必再躲雨了 已经过了该打烊的时候
还是不太想走 太晚了只能坐计程车
为什么想念着摩托车 常常会半路熄火的后座
本来不觉得你特别疼我 直到你放弃爱我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣 不会再庇护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我 直到你不再疼我以后
来不及了 长长的简讯对象已经不会是我

走在湿漉漉红砖道上 沿着导盲砖试着假装
的确有点困难 也许我就这样走路回家
反正你不再在乎几点 该几点回到家
本来不觉得你特别疼我 直到你再也不疼我以后
已经过去雨伞和雨衣 不会再保护我
本来不觉得你特别疼我 直到你放弃爱我以后
来不及了 对不起长大太慢害
你遗失了我 抱歉让你白费了这么多

I started on my new job le. haha.. 1st day mah... abit boring... coz whole day read the documents on the ISO 9001 and HACCP. wanna sleep sia.. haha they say 1st day of work is like tt sian de... haha.. ya lor..

then the ppl there all chinese speaking de lor. haha... xian n ting say is my environment mah.. since i dun like to speak english,.. haha..

hopefully next week life wun be so sian.. haha.. or else i sure drag till dunno like wat sia...

sat.. after tuition.. nth to do.. so go aunt's hse... see ah mei jie jie 2nd child... carawin... i was amaze!!! he was double his size since the last time i met him which was 1 or 2 mths ago.. mommy now call him fishball.. hahaa... cute cute... hee nw i think he look almost as big as bing bing lor.. hee...

then meet ah hui in cwp... at 1st wanna go ktv... but too ex.. so no sing.. end up go my hse coffee shop eat, then he come up my hse get his stuff.. haha...

today gotta go ktv.. hee.. with ly they all... haha... going off le... or else later late.. hee

I'm back from Thailand... one week away in Thailand.. was quite enjoyable to me lah... dunno how the other 3 felt.. haha...

anyway, met my thai frens.. haha... really miss those times... Jo n Phan are an item now... omg... haha... there goes one potential... hahaa... ok ok.. joking only.. feel so happy for them.. Really appreciate Jo for taking off her time to accompany us.. n help us do so much things n organise so many things for us..

and oso muz thank Tum, Ae, Golf, Bow, Joy, Phan and many more.. they were having exams... still take off time to come meet us. Miss them lots... hhaahaa

This time round we like meet alot of ppl sia.. hahaa..a lot of ppl take care of us wo.. 1st r our thai frens, then WY's dad, then Zac's godparents... wao... BIG THANX to every1 sia..

one week in Thai... of coz lotsa things happen.. n most of the time kept us laugh till nonstop de lor.. esp WY de incidents.. haha.. zac lah.. kept suaning wy slow.. ok.. she was indeed WOLS at times... haha.. n she have her wierd way of doing things lor..dunno y she cant hear wat zac say.. so she either didnt laugh or give a blur face or say 'huh?'.. at 1st zac tot she was cool... so didnt find his lame joke funny.. end up realised tt she is slow.. she cant get his joke, tt's y didnt laugh.... got one time zac shopped till he very sian... so he squad down at the roadside to wait for us, wy asked 你的脚很酸啊？ zac replied 没有，很咸。 normally when someone heard this.. the 1st rxn will to scold tt person lame.. or broke into laughter... but wy no rxn.. she say 'orh'... then dunno wat happen... she then realised tt zac was laming her.. (tt was i think 30secs later)... then she started laughing... we all (-_-!)....
the funniest thing is tt when water got into one side of her ear, she tilted her head to tt side (this is normal), n she pour water down at the other side(this is abnormal). Zac was the 1st to notice it.. n ask her wat she was doing.. n she replied in a serious manner tt she was trying to get the water out frm her ears... we were amused... zac reminded her tt both ears r not connected in striaght line... haha... she kept insisting tt her mtd works.. Yihang told her it's coz she tilt her head one side n not due the water she poured in at the other side... hahaa... n the 3 of us were laughing like wat lor.. haha... (ok.. wy, wanna scold go scold zac.. he told me muz put this in my blog de. haha)

Thru' out the trip.. i guess Zac allow me to see the other side of him.. hahaa.. he let me change my pt of view of him completely.. nw i understand y he got certain actions... n i really respect him for being who he is.. hahaa... as for yh.. already 熟到烂... so no surprise lah.. but he is more n more 'color'... ok.. juz in case yh see lah.. say i bias.. i will say oso.. zac is oso very 'color'.. hahaa... nt as much as yh.. :p

met KL in Thai.. so qiao sia... n oso me n wy saw HK actor Liu qing yun n his wife in thai when we were shopping.. hee...

didnt shop much this time round.. coz our dear zac dun like shopping... n he feels tired easily when comes to shopping.. but he still amaze by my energy lvl when it comes to shopping... hahaa.. :p one thing.. zac is like a kid.. haha... u muz see him with his gun.. a big kid sia.. haha...

when Pattaya for one day.. stayed on the beach.. end up kana sun burn.. haha... played water sports... but i most of the time was swimming in the sea lah.. haiz.. poor me.. kana abuse by yihang n zac lor... bully me.. i mean us... me n wy... threw sand... made us do 'water stuns'!!! kaoz... zac better still lor.. i was with him on jet ski.. he was riding it... at 1st i was holding onto him tightly... coz he was to fast n furious lah.... scare me out of my life... then he slowed down.. i tot he liang xin fa xian... who noes, the moment i losen my grip a little... he picked up speed.. n i was thrown overboard in the middle of the sea.. N HE STILL DUNNO!!!! he cont'd riding for a dist.. then realised i was NOT behind him.. he stunned!!! but when he see me... he started laughing... kaoz...

yihang rode on the jet ski with wy behind.. this wy... screamed n shout once yh picked up a little speed... n nice yh.. slowed down a little... coz wy made so much noise... i made so much noise zac can still carry on.. OMG!! haha... then WY was thown into the sea, into the swimming pool by yh n zac.. coz they wanna a bdae bash for her... n for me.. i no bdae oso kana bash,... dunno how they caught my legs n hands.. n end up doing somersaults in the sea and pool.. drinking dunno how much water in.. tt day.. our stomachs (me n wy) were filled with water...

We celebrated wy's bade at Pattaya.. in Jo's dad de hotel.. at 1st wanna give wy a surprise. end up Jo gave us a SURPRISE!! we wanted a cake to celebrate her bdae only... we didnt noe Jo actually prepare so much sia.. i think WY was touched.... hahaa... hope WY enjoyed the bdae... it shall be the unforgettable de.. hahahaa...

hmmm.. shld sleep liao.. tml 1st day of work.. hahaa.. late then jia lat le.. hee.. :p

夜深了，我睡不着。有好多话，不知要怎么说出来。友情，亲情，爱情那个重要？有人会说三者都重要，有人也做出选择。我会选友情和亲情。你呢？应该是爱情吧？

我们之间，存在的不只是友情，还有亲情。我们好比亲姐妹。但到底发生了什么事？为什么我们之间只剩下的是虚伪的笑容，毫无心灵之间的沟通。我们不再像以前无所不谈，因为有很多事情，你选择不去碰。你是不是也和我一样有同样的感觉？还是你选择性的和我疏远？

也许是因为我的坚持吧。我不应该干涉你的感情，我也没有资格这么做。在此，我要奉劝大家：不要阻止别人的感情。因为，你们会和我一样，失去一个很好很好的姐妹。因为人以碰到感情，就会变成另一个人了。

为何我会阻止？不是因为你们不会有结果。我相信，若是你的，一定是你的。不管路多难走。只要你们是真心相爱，一定会突破种种困难，然后开花结果。我阻止，是因为我看到你的眼泪。你为他而哭泣。你因为不知他下一秒是否会离开你而感到不安。我看到的，让我好心疼。因为好在乎你，所以不想看见你不开心的样子，不想看到你哭泣的脸。因为你，我哭了好几次，我觉得自己好没用，你哭，我不知该怎么做。所以一心想把那让你不开心的原因拿掉。谁知道，我却好像做错了。因为你没开心。反而，你远离了我。不再找我。 逃避我。

也许我真的错了。错得好离谱。错在因为心疼你，所以不想看见你哭泣而劝你离开他。错在因为疼惜你，而骂你。我看到你的眼泪，看到你眼中的不安，看到你的不确定，你却说你和他在一起很开心。我还能说什么？只能说，希望你是真的开心。骗我不要紧，千万不要骗自己。

你说你不想放，因为你知道你放不下。我问你，知否有尝试过？你说有，很多次。我又问，你是否有进全力。你选择不回答。为什么呢？是不是因为你觉得我又要劝你离开他？还是你恨我，因为我反对你这段感情？
你想想看，每当他离开你，你有试着放下，但你没全力以赴。你封闭自己，让自己哭了好几天，不肯走出迷惘。然后宣告失败。你放弃放下。这不叫做尝试着放下。

你说我不了解你的感受。你说我不懂爱。你就懂吗？你知道爱吗？？？ 难道我的感情路，走得很容易吗？我的故事，你最清楚不过。婷的故事，你也非常清楚。我们不深爱我们心中的那个他吗？我们的痛，没的和你相提并论？凭什么说我们不了解？

我没告诉我们的朋友这一次究竟发生什么事。我不想别人再担心。痛，我自己扛。眼泪，往肚子里吞。

他的一句甜言蜜语胜过我十句的苦口婆心。真的不能忽略爱情的魔力。也许你真的能得到幸福。也许他真的能给你幸福。只是我瞎了，看不到。不管怎样，我希望你开心。我会一直把你放在我心里。你永远是我的好姐妹，好朋友。

我，在你心里还是不是好姐妹、好朋友？由你自己决定。即使你选择了远离我、恨我，我会尊重你的选择。因为我只想你开心。

03/03/06 marks the end of my three yrs poly life... today is the end... end of my exam.. end of poly life... no longer have to go sch... starting another stage in my life.. the REAL adult life where u only left with work work work n more work.... i always wonder... m i able to cope it mah?? coz my job has a very wide job scope... n it's really a very challenging job... can i do it well? ms toh believes tt i can do it.. then i more stress... coz cant disappoint her mah....aiyoz... hahaa

3 yrs liao leh... to think tt it was juz recently tt i got over with my 'A's results n got into SP to start all over again.. time flies sia.... juz like tt...i graduate liao.... hahaa.. ting oso coming back le...
3 yrs.. have i grown? have i changed? i oso dunno.. coz i feel tt it still the same me.. juz feeling older...wahaha.. haiz...

3 yrs... i've made great frens... wonderful frens... got noe to liyun 1st... the 1st fren in sp... haha.. suddenly got girl come tok to em i stunned.. she approached me 1st... wahaha... but i always wonder... y can she apprach me 1st tt time.. when she is so shy with strangers???? hmmm... then went into DCP 1B22.. know alot of ppl.. n got a big clique consist of 9 ppl... me, liyun, xiao hua, teckhong, daniel, shuhui, yiyun, yingxiu.... thru' out yr 1.. we had lotsa wonderful time... hee... muz thanx all those who gave me happy times... n always there for me de... without u all i dunno how i can survive thru...

2nd yr.. got into fd tech.. DCP 2B23... yeepei joined us.. with liyun n me n xiao hua in the same class.. then dunnO how we formed.. end up yr 3... the big clique again with me, xiao hua, liyun, yee pei, wenying, weijie, kahguan, zac, and yihang... had lotsa fun.. enjoyed the times we had... these r memories tt i will keep it forever.. unless i lost my memories... hahaha....

between 1st n 2nd yr.. he came into my life... 2nd sem of 1st yr and 1st sem of 2nd yr... he was there for me... accompanying me in every moment of my life... i was actually healing a wound at tt point of time.. n he was there for me... making the wound to heal faster... we had lotsa happy times and sweet moments together... sth tt i'll treasure it for as long as i can remember...
he left me... during my 1st ito in thailand... actually i realise tt the world is fair.. u gained sth.. u lost sth... i went thailand for ITP... got know to a bunch of wonderful frens in thai... n oso got closer to yihang... n i lost him... n till now.. i still wondering y... but it's no longer impt... coz i gave up le... will think of it occassionally.. will still feel the pain... but no longer have the urge to get back with him....

2nd yr end of 2nd sem.. my 2nd itp.. got into a relationship like a flash.. got out like a flash too.. haha... well.. we were not meant to be ba... though waited for him for 6 yrs... being with him was nt wat i imagined... mayb coz too long le... n coz was in a half give up mode... one thing... i've wondered recently.. last time b4 we got together.. he didnt say anything nice abt me... but still will recognise my gd pts... when we got together... he can list my gd pts.. though oso suan me lah... but when we broke up. suddenly i m a terrible person... coz he say i got no gd pts for him to say... y huh? m i so jia lat? i changed? frm bad to worse? haiz..

thru's out the 3 yrs... ting is always there for me... though most of the time is online de... but her presence really make feel comfortable... thanx darling... :p

thank him for giving my happiest time in 1/3 of my poly life...

thanx all my frens for being my frens for being the wonderful ppl ard me...

th n xh.. u r juz like my little bro n sis to me... i teng u all so much.. coz u 2 really like xiao didi xiao mei mei... hahaha... i really wish to attend ur wedding... hee.. ur da jie always here for u all... :p

yp.. ren hao jiu hao... dun overly hao... dun hurt urself... among the frens.. i worry abt u the most sia... coz u too gd liao... too weak liao... may get hurt when going outside to work.. haiz... learn to be strong.. i've learnt... so can u... anyway... jia you... may u reach ur dream of becoming a teacher... u can de!

ly, though we had disagreement at times... u had a great impact on me leh.. u show me a different pt of view in life...u let me learn alot of things.. u acc me crazy over shuai ge... u amaze me with ur theory.. wahaha... n amaze me with ur photocopy memory.. hahaa... u r a great person with a strong personality... believe in urself... coz u r capable de... n talented... juz tt u didnt realise it only... wahaha

yihang... if i no write... u sure complain.. wahaha... u mah.. no need worry de.. u noe so well wat u r doing... but dun be so 'colour' lah. aiyo... treat ur pw nice nice... enjoyed the times when we can debate over a qns on how to do.. how does it sound logical... hahaa...u r lazy... but when come to sch work... prob solving.. u r one of my strongest opponent n partner.. haha...u r always a great fren.. a listener... a person who is there to help... :p

wenying... my auntie... ahahaa... u allow me to see alot of things tt i missed out in my life.. i learn alot of things frm u.. frm ur life... n of coz.. another person who will acc me crazy over shuai ge...

zachary.. the shuai ge... i tell u wo... u caught my eyes ever since yr 1... hahaa.. anyway, ur craps n stupid actions really can make me laugh my head off lor.. u always can let me destress de... :p
u r some1 who really cut out to big boss de... jia you wo... hee...

hmmm.. like writing testimonials leh.. ahaha... these cant be use for jobs.. too bad.. hee... stillgot alot.. but lazy to type liao.. hee

3 papers down.. one more to go.. fd packaging.. but no mood study nw... haiz... hope this time can make it,... wahaha...

thru out the week, had been studying like siao... damn funny oso lah... coz everytime got yihang, zac, wj acc... stress oso will laugh till dunno like wat le.... haha

zac's bdae on 27th.. we got a paper on 28th... wahaha.. so poor him.. have to spend his 21st bday studying for his exam.. wahaha.. we went celebrate with him after 28th's paper.. go eat swensens.. wahahaa... coz this zac ar... everything oso have... n things he wants.. i think we cant afford de.. so decided to give him a practical present ----> boxers... he got wear de lor... n this is such a cute boxer lor... :p... he saw it le he high.. wahaha.... with elephant... the truks can take up got ruler... can measure.. wahahhaa..... erm.. ok.. abit too.. R(A) liao.. wahahaa


looking forward to the end of exam.. coz going thailand with zac, yihang and wenying.. wahaha... so happy.. can see my thai frens liao... going on the 7th.. coming back on the 14th... hee.. then 16th start work.. wahaha... all planned out... hope nth crops up...

This is an interesting website minghui intro de... hahhaa... though ppl think is bo liao.. i still think is fun.. wahahaa

Arena (known to self and others) adaptable, cheerful, silly, tense	Blind Spot (known only to others) able, caring, dependable, energetic, extroverted, friendly, happy, helpful, idealistic, intelligent, kind, knowledgeable, logical, loving, mature, modest, patient, reflective, responsive, searching, self-conscious, sentimental, trustworthy, warm, witty
Fa?ade (known only to self) accepting	Unknown (known to nobody) bold, brave, calm, clever, complex, confident, dignified, giving, independent, ingenious, introverted, nervous, observant, organised, powerful, proud, quiet, relaxed, religious, self-assertive, sensible, shy, spontaneous, sympathetic, wise

Dominant Traits

68% of people agree that tyl is cheerful
56% of people think that tyl is friendly

All Percentages

able (6%) accepting (0%) adaptable (6%) bold (0%) brave (0%) calm (0%) caring (31%) cheerful (68%) clever (0%) complex (0%) confident (0%) dependable (18%) dignified (0%) energetic (18%) extroverted (12%) friendly (56%) giving (0%) happy (18%) helpful (50%) idealistic (6%) independent (0%) ingenious (0%) intelligent (18%) introverted (0%) kind (18%) knowledgeable (12%) logical (6%) loving (12%) mature (18%) modest (6%) nervous (0%) observant (0%) organised (0%) patient (12%) powerful (0%) proud (0%) quiet (0%) reflective (6%) relaxed (0%) religious (0%) responsive (18%) searching (6%) self-assertive (0%) self-conscious (6%) sensible (0%) sentimental (37%) shy (0%) silly (31%) spontaneous (0%) sympathetic (0%) tense (6%) trustworthy (25%) warm (18%) wise (0%) witty (6%)

Created by the Interactive Johari Window on 23.2.2006, using data from 16 respondents.
You can make your own Johari Window, or view tyl's full data.

After going thru 2 interviews.. 1st with the HR manager, then the BIG BOSS (MD lah)... i got the job... 16th mar will start work.. wahaha.. at Gold Kili - the company tt comes out with beverages..it's a new challenge... she told me i muz be independent... n able to take stress... hmmm m i up to it?? i dunno... juz hope everything will go smoothly...

met him for dinner today.. to pass him tt long belated bdae present... he cut his hair.. neater... nicer... i shld be happy... i WAS happy initially.. coz i really missed him.. but the moment i saw him... my mood was dampened.. 他给我的感觉淡了。though we chat, we tok.. he suan me.. i complained he bullied me.. but still... nt the same anymore... the feeling is not there anymore... i cried once again.. this time nt due to anything he say or wat he did.. juz feel sad.... sad by a fact tt hit me so hard tt i felt pain even deep inside my heart... he is no longer the one who give me the warmth and care like he used to... the care n warmth he gave... r juz memories... memories...

still can remember once he told me... when i was still healing frm the previous wound... '我不能像他对你那么好，但我能给你的是快乐的时光.' which is true... he had given many happy moments.. sweet moments... but still.. haiz.. he hurt me in the end too...

i realised sth today... i'm in too deep.. so deep till it scares me... how come?? i tot i wun... haiz.. i'm so stupid... y cant i juz get up.. 4get everything once n for all?! wat yanxin told me is correct.. i'm worse than huixian.. at least after giving.. she gotten back at least a status... at least sth... but me?? wat i got?? nth.. juz hurt n more hurt... so y m i still holding on?? m i going to take a long time to heal this time?? haiz.. drag so long le... i still cant get myself out of this mess!!!

anyway, this shld be the last time meeting him le... at least for me.. is the last time i took the initiative.. we r nw 最熟悉的陌生人。

PQM test down! EIC test down!! tml will be flavours pract test... we have to name the unknown.. n describe how it smell... juz by looking, smelling or tasting the samples.. haha... hope tt wun die till too ugly....

Past few days were nightmare! 1st IA had to rush finish. almost every night stayed till 4am... then reports tt we owed... must all hand in by last fri... coz teachers need to key in the marks... stress stress... this is call last min work lor...

8th feb was the farewell party... interesting programmes... finally can see matthew they all dance live de le.. whahaa... took lotsa pics... still waiting for ppl to send....enjoyed... hehee... then after farewell, me, yp n ly went jp to find gift for kg... though need to go back rush IA report.. but still wanna get sth for him mah...

9th feb was KG bdae.. tt idiot man!! i was totally pissed tt day lor... coz y.. i spent the whole night to wrap the present in layers... n think of sth for him to do each layer.. n of coz wanna he unwrap in front of us... as a little celebration for him.. who noes.. the whole day cant find him!!! guess wat... he in IR!! tt make me more piss lor... y guys dun seems to appreciate wat ppl do for them??? treat them as fren.. tt's y spend so much effort de mah.. if dun treat them as fren... i dun even care lor.. kaoz!!!! i was angry.. n i tell myself.. never to celebrate any of the guys who born in the year 1986 de bdae!! dun bother abt the sms.. dun bother abt the present... waste of time, money and brain cells only! till nw, i still quite sore lor.. but of coz lah.. nt tt xiao qi de.. esp since he apologised le...

10th feb... i spent the whole day in sch to finish up IA.. me, ly and yp.. tot xh still got a lot of reports to do.. so dun dare to stress her somemore... did till 4am. then 11 sth went to sch... do all the way till 6pm... no drink no eat.. juz do.....after 6... then me n ly realise we had not eaten... n was damn hunrgy.. wahaha.. went get wafer.. n made my way to RSS.. took leave to attend the mentoring meet the parents session... as i say.. i never regret of taking leave for mentoring de...coz sure enjoy de lor.. all my beloved mentees become mentors... then the sec 2 ( nw sec 3 de).. all see me stun.. coz i wasnt wearing specs.. wahaha.. then i suddenly got 2 sons.. one is syzwan and the other is hydayat... wahhaa... yt.. jealous mah?? wahaha.. syzwan leh... hehee... syzwan is the cute boy.. hydayat is the boy who always wanna get back at me.. coz i sabo him go on stage once.. wahaha....

haizz... exam starting le... sianz... muz study... sianz sianz sianz

His bdae present is still with me... dunno when then can i pass it to him... y did i buy it in the 1st place?? haiz... i wanna meet him b4 CNY to give it to him... but he didnt want.. i oso dunno y... he always has his own wierd reasons. he asked me to 4get his bdae... coz he dun celebrate bdae.. so to him, bdae is not impt... i dunno y he got such a rxn.. i happily go find sth suitable for him. happily ask him how shld i pass him his present... he gave me this kind of rxn...

i was really pissed!! the 1st time ever i got so fed up n wish to get this person out of my life once n for all.... i told him.. might as well 4get him as a fren... he said he dun mind... if it was few mths back... i'd treat it as him joking... n i'll make noise... n bicker with him.. but tt day.. i was tired.. damn tired.. i had no rxn... i was angry.. i dun feel like toking... i'm totally disappointed... in him, in me... i dunno wat really happen... i dunno wat the hell he is thinking.. wat i noe is i damn tired of everything!!!!!!!

where is the person who noe it when i stress; who will make me laugh when i nt happy; who will console me when i'm sad? that person is gone... gone long time ago... so y m i still so stupid.. holding on?? i told ppl ard me.. i'm going to give the present to other ppl... but i noe i wun. coz this is a gift for him... n only for him.. if it's with other ppl.. it is juz nt suitable ba... haiz... feel like send it to his hse thru post... then mark the end of everything.. treat it as i never noe this person b4...

can i do it??? haha.. i dunno... 人是矛盾的，不要想起，却不舍得忘记。

Sch started after long break of CNY... yet we all still in holiday mood sia... no mood study de lor.. go class juz for the sake of attendance only.. wahahaa...

after sch, we went lib to find some info for report,... then go flavors lab see others doing their beverage.. wahaha.. n taste losta drink till mumb sia.. wahaha.. we, y-gang helped zac's grp to taste their yoghurt drink.. fun sia... wahaha.. tt food lab is juz like our 2nd home like tt le.. hee...

after that went PS to watch movie.... with yihang, zac, yipei, wenying.. we watched FEARLESS.. nice show.. wahhaa... action packed.. with jet li.. he really old le.. can see he aged alot sia... but still cool lor.. fearless is based on a true story of the chinese wushu hero huo yuan jia... ending quite sad.. coz he died... tt YP!!! she cried non-stop sia!! the 1st time yp cry i laugh.. wahaha... the 1st time i see someone watch action pack movie can cry till dunno like wat... wahaha...

she say very touching... which is true.. esp those words he said b4 he died.. but still nt to the extend of crying till so jia lat leh... after show in toilet.. she still cry lor.. wahhaa.. yp really a very very kind n emotional soul lor..

then today, me, ly, yp, xh, th, yh n ter went watch Zodiac... SG productions.. think this is the 1st time they doing animation... not bad for a 1st timer ba... but if u r looking for 3d effects n excellent animation, then better dun watch it... coz will be disappointed de lor.. still nt up to the standard ba..

Lucky this time round... yp no cry... yh said she may cry coz she feel sad for cow, coz cow shld win n not mouse... wahaha... ok lah.. dun bully yp le.. hee... tml no sch.. so slack.. n hopefully can finish all my stuff

CNY holidays going to end soon... wahaha... 4 days of holidays... so fast.. tml gotta go sch le.. sianz... very fast.. exam coming le.. haiz... anyway, this CNY quite fun sia....

1st.. on new year eve, we went to msia to play with fireworks... haha.. yep... fire works.. those they displayed it during national day, xmas, New Yr and CNY de... in SG only govt can use it... haha.. in msia... we can buy frm stores then light it ourselves!!!! hahaa.. was so fun... hehee.... took 2 hrs to reach my uncle's place... then 2 hrs back SG... when reach SG.. already 4 am le.. wahaha....

1st day of CNY went to ah ma hse... fourth auntie told me i getting prettier n prettier... i almost faint lor... kaoz.. how can use pretty on me lah!!!!! yucks!!! i no want be pretty.. wahaha... anyway, she say i chun feng man mian... hahaa.. say surly nw got bf... i almost faint oso..i where got bf nw.. guys r giving me headaches... how to get a bf??? give me more headaches only... hahhaa

then to ah pek hse... Donald 1st yr gimme ang bao.. coz he married le mah... guess wat... his wife same age as yp they all n he is one yr older than me... n they giving me ang bao.. abit wierd sia... haha,.. but juz take only... hee...

go yanxin's godpa hse... then back home DO REPORT!!! sianz... hahaa after tt go big aunt's hse... play with all my nephews.. wahaha....

2nd day drove to KH's hse...with yh, jj... 1st yr no LCM.. he started work liao.. on 2nd day on new yr.. sianz lor.. if lcm go.. sure tease junjie de... coz he was there oso.. n say wanna go KL see sun yan zi with yh.. yh almost fainted sia.. wahaha... zhen wei, chang cheng, cheryl were there oso... after tt they come my hse.. tot lcm would join us at night.. end up he didnt appear... he no reply our sms, no pick up our calls... he seems like withdrawing frm us lor... sometime i wonder izzit coz of me... but so long already... there wasnt any prob till recently mah... dunno wat happen oso... dunno to worry, to be angry or to be sad.. or i juz think too much...
we played black jack.. n guessed wat... i won!! wahahaa... in the end.. i won... hee...

3rd day, which is today.... met yp, ly, yh, wj, xh, th go wy's hse.... then to yp hse... then finally my hse... today wy, yp, ly, xh all ebase supporter sia... wear ebase de clothes... n xh, yp, ly wore the same one.. different color only.. wahhaa... they came my hse... derrick they all oso here... so we played balck jack again... wj lost... me won again.. hee.. this yr is a gd yr... wahaha... dun care got bf mah... win money can le.. wahaha...

25th Jan 2006 marks then end of FYP. today was the FYP formal presentation. we were so stressed up... coz afraid that there would be sth worng.. in fact i think i've stressed ly and xh. so sorry abt that. i was very very stressed coz i noe mr tan, my co-examiner was not satisfy with our results. so he bound to bomb us with qns de. i prepared and made sure that i had absolutely logical explaination to each of our results.

this is the 1st time i wrote scripts for my presentation, this is the 1st time i felt tensed for my presentation. this is the 1st time i practice a lot of time for my presentation. haiz... i tot we were prepared for his bombing...

but.. he asked qns that was... too stunned?! n i cant explain... i tot i could tackle his every qns de.. but then his qns was too sudden.. my mind went blank.. n xh did the explaination. by the time i recovered... i think is too late to explain le. the lecturers in the room helped us... which we were really grateful... Thanx wo....

ly n xh were asking y was i laughing at the back... i only told them so that i wun cry in front of them... coz at that point of time.. i was really disappointed.. disappointed y the always seems confident me can be stunned for so long.. n end up.. didnt help much in the explaination... angry y he suspect our ability to get results... n of coz the stress tt had been with me recently... then moment i reached FC 2.. i saw YP.. actually i meant to whine abit only like i normally do.. but then dunno y.. whine become cry lor... sianz... i think i scared most of them ba.. coz frm wat i noe... all of my poly frens (except 1) never seen me cry lor.. yh called it the 难得一见的奇观。i almost fainted... but i was disappointed in myself.. n was angry with myself mah.... haiz... sianz lor.. cry in front of quite a lot of ppl.. yp, ly, xh, wy... still nvm.. i didnt noe tt kg, wj n jeremy were there too.. till xh told me!!! omg!!! wj told me after tt that he saw all my ugly side le.. i mearly wanna punch him sia!!!!

after tt we took a very very very loooooong time to decide where to eat... as all got different preference... however, we decided to go eat ala cart buffet in a hotel... ly gotta eat crab to her fill... haha she wanna revenge... coz the day b4, coz of fyp... she skipped dinner... n her bro tot she eaten le.. so ate up all her crab... wahaha...

It's quite sometime since i last updated. have been very bz for the past few days... Reports n data sheets to be finished, then got spinnovex stuff to prepare and work 5 days a week... sleep oso nt enough le... so cant update.. wahhaha

dunno y.. juz took up lotsa classes... mon, tue, thurs, fri, sat.. all got teach... wahaha.. sometime i was wondering wat the hell m i thinking.. making myself so tired.. wahaha... then coz tt spiinovex is a very big thing... somemore our project is highlighted... so muz be really be presentable lor.. today is the last day of spinnovex le... finished! finally! ahaha... nw time to cheong FYP presentation le... haha

Spinnovex quite interesting lor.. alot of things to see, to play,.. then very interesting things happen oso lor.. coz we in the main tent... so is a mixture of all schs in SP.. we get to noe quite a few ppl frm different sch.. wahaha.. coz only our side got samples to eat mah...mine chocolate, and yixian's coco puff pastry... n coz my side here got 3 beauties... liyun, xiao hua and yixian... wahahaa...

alot of VIPs came... and they made it sounded as if the VIPs are scary ppl.. in fact... the VIPs are nice ppl... n understanding... scary de are those lecturers lor and company's representative... they asked qns tt dunno who the hell can ans de lor.. wahahaa.. overall... quite enjoyable.. minus the boring part, eg. explaining.. nth to do, wahaha.... then got the closing ceremony de.. but i got wedding dinner.. so cant go... hahaa

went to Donald's wedding juz nw... cant imagine it lor!! he is getting married!!! he is a yr older than me only!!! he is already married!!! n me?! still here... running ard like a kid... seems like never gonna settle down... haha... sometime i wonder.. will i ever really fall for a guy.. n settle down mah.. hehe.. think tt will be many yrs later ba... by tt time mayb alot of frens ard me already daddy n mommy le lor... hahaa.... hmmm... mayb i'll be single forever.. wahaha... okok i can hear yt, ivan, xin jie shouting 'it'll never happen!!' hee.. well.. u never noe wat will happen in the future....

Wao... finally.. i got my laptop.. hee... my own comp le... wahahaa....

hmmm... it had been raining almost everyday... then my hse damn cold lor... then everynight so late so think gonna fall sick soon... hahaha....

watching e mo zai shen bian (恶魔在身边) by rainie yang and he jun xiang... very nice... last few episodes i cried till dunnno like wat.. hahaa... coz sad mah.. yet sweet... LOVE ah meng!!! hahaa... now i realised tt.. nan ren bu huai.. tyl dun like.. whaha... then nan ren tai huai.. yp dun like... hee... we r different...

I recommend everyone go watch ba... hehee....

on sun... went to chloe's 1st bdae.... at orchid country club... hahaa... so nice rite??? then went over to see ah mei jie jie's new born... her 2nd child... he was supposingly to come out on 13th jan de... but then i think he too anxious to see the world... before 2006.. he came out already... early by.. think abt 2 weeks... he was soooo small.... then yx dun dare to carry... wahaha...... anyway, he looks like ang mo... with brown hair and greyish blue eyes... hahaa... juz like his elder brother... i say daivd's ang mo genes overpowered my jie jie's asian genes.. tt's y the 2 kids all so ang mo.. wahahaa....

tml got PQM quiz... yet i'm still here rotting... haiz... time to study le.....

Wao... FINALLY!! on 06 - 01 - 06, FYP report handed up le.. wahahaa... at least can rest abit.. abit only.. wahahaa.... haven been sleeping well.. coz everynight work till very late.. wahahahaa....

06-01-06 oso my darling flying off.. haiz... my tuition ended at 2200... at 1st tot can make it to airport to sned her off de... haiz.. but end up.. kor n i on car wait for jj wait tilll too late le.. cant reach in time... so we go kopitiam drink coffee.. tt JJ lah.. met problem tt's y late de... anyway, after tt kor drove me home... my ting flew off...

before i went tuition, went suntec with my ting.. she bought so many things... hahaa... siao de.. hehe...

haiz.. tis time she came back.. i so bz... like really no meet her like tt... i mean didnt meet her as much as i use to ba.. when then can we go back to last time?? haiz...

i juz took up lotsa tuition classes... every week do 5 days.. i think i really siao le.. ahahaa... nvm lah.. tired better than nth to do.. then anyhow think.. hee

HAPPY NEW YEAR! it's the 1st day of 2006! a new year.. a new start?? hee...
had a little celebration last night.. BBQ at my hse.. with my bro's grp of frens, n my poly grp of frens. Initally there were lotsa conflicts n stuff.. but end up.. it was a fun event.. hee.. enjoyed!!

LY, WY, YP, XH, TH, WJ, KG, YH and PW were invited. At 1st we were toking abt staying overnight at my hse... end up.. YP, LY decided not to stay overnight, then WY oso... then TH sick cant come, XH cant make it either.. to tell the truth.. i was really disappointed le.. can u imagine.. u spend so much time and effort.. then ur respond was... 'hey, i cant make it'... but of coz i noe i canty blame them...
yesterday, it was raining heavily.. then we were wondering r we able to BBQ.. n i gave it till 6pm.. to see if the rain would stop.. well.. meanwhile things happne.. n i was totally pissed!! 1st.. muz apologised to XH if my tone yesterday wasnt gd.. coz i was really not in gd mood yesterday.. woke up late.. rush down to work w/o eating anything.. plus all the sms.. n rain...
ok.. i admit tt when YP called i nearly wanted to shout at her.. but i chose to kept quiet.. coz nt YP's fault.. i'm juz feeling pissed.. YP, if i hurt u or anything.. i'm sorry.. i really didnt mean it de... then i totally sian half...

of coz.. end up.. rain stopped, ppl arrived... n of coz.. had fun... at 12midnight.. they went down to the beach to watch fireworks.. then after that the girls went back.. left YH, PW, KG n WJ.. we played all sorts of stupid games.. drank quite a lot too.. then i think KG abit HIGH le.. haha.. drank too much.. wahaha...

abt 3.. YH n PW went back.. my bro drove them back after he drove his frens back.. then WJ n KG stayed... me n my sis n the 2 of them sat in my lving room tok, crap, suan, sabo, laugh, lame.. till 9 sth in the morning.. none of us slept.. haha.. but of coz.. by tt time we were abit dreamy le.. so WJ n KG went off.. while me n my sis went to bed..

poo KG kana suan by me till dunno wat.. i think he went back home cry ba.. hahaa.. lucky he nt living on high rise building.. or else mayb can c on headlines ' Boy, 19, jumped down from building on New Year's Day' wahahaa.. ok ok.. cannot suan him le.. or esle sure got bao ying de!!! hee

Nw back to FYP!!!! HAIZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!